“No, he would not have wandered out on his own.” Moth squints, as if still trying to make sense of it all. “It wasnoaccident.”
“Moth…”
“It was the first time I tried to use my powers on anyone else. I encased him in a cocoon. Unlike with you, my body was left half-exposed, attached to a giant egg that held his body. I did not know if he would survive. I could not bear to be seen or consoled, so I hid in the one place I thought no one wouldfind me.”
The Crystal Caves.
“Oh my god. Moth, I am so sorry.” As if on cue, Sprout launches his giant body onto the bed, and for the first time, I realize his little antennae are not a part of his species, but a mark of his new life—justlike mine.
“It is no wonder he’s taken to you,” Moth says, ruffling his fur. Sprout huffs, laying his head across my legs. If the creature I have the most in common with in this world is a dog,so be it.
“My mother found me before Sprout emerged from the cocoon. She was horrified. At the time, I thought it was of what I had done. But she held me and quietly whispered through her tears that it would all be alright. I understand it was my father’s actions that made her look down at me with such disgust. Her face twisted in a way that made her look unrecognizable to my child eyes.”
“Moth…” For the first time, I’m speechless. “You know none of it was your fault, right?”
“Perhaps—”
“No, babe, you were a child.” I reach down, weaving my fingers between his. “What he did wasn’t your fault at all.”
“It did work,” he says bitterly, giving my attempt at comfort no acknowledgement. “I could heal after that day because this realm no longer felt like home. Shortly after was the start of Father’s illness. I put all my focus into becoming a better king than he was, and until his body weakened, he put even more pressure on me to learn. That is why I was so …pricklyabout the idea of staying here.”
I bite down on my bottom lip. Trying to process all of that in one afternoon? God, no wonder he was angry journaling in the middle ofthe night.
“You are literally reliving terrible trauma.” Reaching over, I brush a dark curl from his face. “I give you full permission to be prickly—and honestly? I was no picnic either. I’mso sorry.”
“It has been a long week.” He shakes his head, a deep bitter laugh rising from his lips. “My flame, you could make this place your own, yet I feel like a guest in this world. I don’t recall my grand plans, the changes I wanted to make, the person I wanted to be.Deathis truly gone, and only your Moth remains. I do not believe this man who delights in quiet and pastries and books is the same who wanted to rule akingdom.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself—whatever you decide.” I sit up, sliding my arm around Sprout. “You have the two of us in your corner.”
“Whom I have foreverchanged…”
“Hey, I’m okay. Sprout’s okay. As evidenced by this cuddle puddle, we both very muchlove you.”
Moth has enough happening without worrying about me—which is good because besides the newfound ache in my joints and the fuzzy feeling I’ve been having at the base of my forehead, I am totally fine.
“Whatever you need, I got you, okay?”
“Mmm,” he hums, weary and unconvinced. “Now, what is it that’s bothering you?”
I gulp. Considering he’s still carrying around some baggage about me beingforever changed, I can’t exactly tell him that the base of my wings aches like a muscle after a long workout, that Chris is back in town and maybe, just maybe, I’m not as okay as I’ve been pretending to be.
And it doesn’t help that I’m fighting what feels like my biggest flare up in years. I just need a good night’s sleep—then everything will be better in the morning.
“Just worrying about you. Honestly, my thyroid stuff is getting a little wonky. No more gluten for the rest of the trip, and I’m sure I’ll be fine,” I say, letting my head fall back on the pillows. It’s the biggest understatement in the world, but for now, it will have to be enough.
“I will speak to the chef tomorrow.”
“No, please don’t.”
“Why?” he asks. “I am disappointed that I neglected to do so when we firstarrived.”
“But now they’re so busy with the ball. I don’t want them tohate me.”
“No one will hate you.” He catches my hand, placing a kiss on my wrist. “I will speak to someone in themorning.”
I have a feeling there’s no talking him out ofthis one.
“Fine,” I begrudgingly agree. “Let’s try to get some rest, huh? Tomorrow is going to be a big day, and hey … thank you for talking to me. That couldn’t have been easy.”
