The cold of his leaving is specific. The place above my eyebrow where his thumb just was. The bone at my temple where it stopped. The shape of him pulling out of the room. The smell of him is still in the furs and on my face but the heat of him went with him.
"Mel."
Kestria. On the edge of the bed. Her hand on my hair.
"Mel, I need to look at your collarbone. Just look. I'm not going to do anything yet."
"Okay."
She moves the collar of my shirt. Sucks her teeth. Goes for water from somewhere. Comes back with a cloth.
"It's not deep. He didn't get the artery. He didn't even get close."
"Good."
"I'm going to clean it."
"Okay."
She cleans it. The cold of the cloth is the only thing I can feel for a minute. Then the sting. The sting is good. I focus on the sting because the sting is something my body can hold.
"There's blood on your face. It's not yours. Can I—"
"Leave it."
She stops.
"Mel."
"Leave it. Just for a minute. I want—" I don't know what I want. "Just for a minute."
She doesn't argue. She wipes around it. Cleans my hands. She works without talking.
"I didn’t know his name."
"Vidar."
I close my eyes.
"He killed Tovar."
"I know."
"In front of everyone."
"I was there."
"He didn't have to kill him. He could have—"
"Mel."
"He could have just pulled him off."
"Tovar had claws at your throat."
"He could have—"
"Mel."
