“Hi baby,” I coo, staring in awe at this new life that we brought into this world. I can feel the tell tale prickle of tears coming in the corner of my eyes. “He’s perfect, isn’t he Mont?”
“He is pretty perfect.” He says in awe, “Just like his mama.” He looks at me with such love and admiration in his gaze. Those deep hazel eyes that I always seem to get lost in.
Staci comes over and takes our boy to get him cleaned up, while the OB-GYN has been working at stitching me up. Monty tracks our son as he’s carried across the room. Reaching out, I grab his wrist and break his concentration. He turns, brows furrowed in concern. “What’s up baby? What do you need?”
“Go with him. Go be with him while they finish up with me here. Spend time with our boy.” His body instantly relaxes, leaning over he brings his lips to mine and pauses briefly before he breathes out, “I love you so much Josie,” placing another quick but firm peck on my lips. Only lingering for a moment, checking to make sure I’m okay, before exiting through the door our son was taken through.
The rest of the operation goes smoothly and before I know it I’m being wheeled back into the recovery room. My eyes zero in on Monty, a pull in my chest leading me exactly to where I know I’ll find him. An instinct I’vehad since the moment we met- I’ve always been drawn to him. He’s sitting in a chair with his shirt off as our son lays on his chest. Both of their eyes are closed as Monty rocks the chair with one foot. Watching, I imprint this view in my memory. I want to be able to look back and remember this exact moment. As we draw closer Monty’s eyes shoot open when he realizes they’re no longer alone. A smile spreads across his face, eyes tracking the movements of my hospital bed as they roll me in place.
When they get me in my spot, Monty slowly stands up coming to my side. I open my hospital gown, releasing my breast from behind the fabric as Monty leans down and places him in my arms. Like riding a bike, readjusting my son to my breast offering him my nipple. He searches briefly before he latches on like a champ. Warmth spreads through my chest, this love that is already so strong for this tiny human I’ve been carrying for nine months.
We spend a bit more time in the recovery, until we finally move over to the maternity ward. Since I had a c-section, I’ll be here for a couple days before they let me go home. I don’t look forward to the hospital food that I’ll have to consume, but it will be totally worth it. We finally have our son.
It’s late afternoon by the time we are settled in our private room. Monty sent everyone home as soon as Hayes was born and I was comfortable in recovery. He’s been in communication with my parents who have been watching over Shiloh, our five year old son.
We settle into the room and the nurse comes in to introduce herself and make sure mine and the baby’s vitals are good. I’m struggling to keep my eyes open as I watch Monty putter around the room, making sure my phone is plugged in and putting my clothes away in the closet they have in the room. He turns around, takes one look at me and closes the distance. His hand rests above my head, leaning forward he places a gentle kiss on my lips. “Rest baby. I got my parents bringing Shiloh in a couple hours. You worked hard, I got you.”
“I love you, Monty.” I mumble, the heaviness of my lids winning the battle to stay awake. I hear a soft chuckle before everything fades away.
I jump awake as the cries of a newborn infiltrate my brain. My boobs have begun to ache, and I feel the starting signs of a let down coming. We’re on day two in the hospital, and overall things have been going well. My nurses have been amazing, and my incision has been healing well with no complications.
I look around the room to try and see where my pump might be. I groan when a sharp pang hits my lower abdomen.
“Where's my pump?” I grumble into the room, grabbing the remote to lift my head up on the bed. Now that I'm sitting up, my eyes catch on the backside of my husband as he sways back and forth shushing our newest family member. I wish I could take more time to admire his ass but fuck my boobs feel like they're going to explode.
“Babe, do you know where my pump is?” My voice is raspy as I clear the sleep from my throat. In the next moment, Monty is by my side.
“Why don’t you try and feed him while I get it ready?” Placing our newest addition into my arms, I take a moment to go over his features. The top of his head dons dirty blonde peach fuzzy. His little button nose begins to scrunch, head turning toward my chest as he begins to root around. Readjusting him, I take my breast out and offer it to him. Huffs and puffs release from his mouth before he latches on and begins to suckle.
I feel the intense cramping in my stomach as my body reacts to breastfeeding. My uterus begins to contract, shrinking back to its normal size, with every pull he takes of my milk. My brows furrow as I work through the pains. Switching from one breast to the other to make sure I continue for as long as he will eat for.
After ten minutes I remove him from my breast and pat his back until that tell tale burp leaves the baby's lips. A quick diaper change, and he’swrapped back up in a swaddle. Monty trades me for the breast pump, trying to see if I can get a little more so that he can have some bonding time with feeding too.
Since my incision has been healing great, the doctor gives me the okay to shower. Making my way to the attached bathroom, I slowly undress making sure not to overdo myself as the water heats up. A moan leaves my lips when the water hits my skin. The heat washes over my body and a shiver rolls through me.
Losing myself in the stream of heat, I don’t know how much time has passed before there is a knock on the door.
“Babe, are you okay in there? Do you need anything?” a smile forms on my face at my husband checking in on me.
“I’m just enjoying the shower.” Tilting my head backward, I wet my hair, “I’ll wash up and then I’ll be right out.”
“Take your time babe, I just wanted to make sure you didn’t need me.” A soft click of the door hits my ears as I begin to lather my hair with soap.
Once finished with that task, I move on to washing myself. Grabbing the hospital bar of soap, I begrudgingly wash my body. I hate bar soap because it always dries up my skin, but I can’t be picky when I realize I forgot to pack body wash of all things in the hospital bag.
Quickly, I dry myself off and set up my new best friend for the time being–adult diapers. I know, I know, why diapers? Why not just use pads. Well, I do both. Regardless of having a c-section, I still bleed afterward, and I refuse to ruin any of my underwear.
Therefore,adult diapers.
They never said motherhood was glorious. Cracked nipples, lack of sleep, bleeding, constipation–you name it.
But I wouldn’t trade it for the world, because it gave me my two boys.
Shuffling out of the bathroom, I join Monty in the sitting area of our private room, so thankful that we were able to snag a private room here. The maternity suite is like your typical copy paste hospital room. You have the hospital bed in the center with the small cupboard storage offto one side of the bed. The window is on one side, which offers bench seating underneath.
Monty wraps his arm around me and brings me to his side. Placing a kiss on the top of my head, I lean into him and just breathe. We sit there in silence just taking in each other's presence. I’m the one who breaks the silence.
“When are your parents coming with Shiloh?” I know it’s been a short time away, but I miss my first born something fierce. He’s a mama’s boy, and I’m honestly a little nervous for how he will react to the new baby.
