I set my purse and computer bag on the long vinyl sofa near Julie’s feet. “And Matt seems great. Thank you for helping with Julie. I can stay here now.”
“I don’t mind,” she says as she collects her things. “I rushed in here when Shannon called. Before I leave, I’m going to get some breakfast in the cafeteria. Can I get you anything?”
I lift the disposable cup filled with coffee that I’m holding. “I’m good. Thank you.”
“Okay, I’ll check in after I eat.” She heads toward the door and turns around. “Is there any news on your sister’s friend?”
“Umm, the sheriff is making an announcement to the town” —I look at my watch— “soon.”
“And you’re not there?”
“I’m here,” I say with a sad grin. “You probably know that I live in California. It isn’t often I can help my family.”
Michelle nods. “Your parents need all the support they can get. This has all been hard on them.”
“Of course. No one wants to see their daughter this way.”
Michelle’s head shakes. “It’s been a difficulttime. I’m sure Shannon’s told you about it all. It isn’t my place, but I pray for that woman every day. They always say you have that one child who keeps you hopping.” Her gaze goes to Julie.
“You mean about this incident?”
Michelle turns back to me. “Really, I shouldn’t say. It just seems that Julie is completely different than Olivia. Sometimes it’s difficult to understand how two children raised in the same household...” She waves her hand. “Of course, I don’t know you but look at you. You’re independent. You aren’t causing your mother sleepless nights.”
Julie is?
I force a grin. “Maybe not now, but I had my turn.”
“Well, worrying about our children is just part of being a mother.” She shakes her head. “Are you sure you don’t want anything from the cafeteria?”
“I’m sure. Thank you again.”
“Oh,” Mrs. Lane says as if remembering, “I messaged Shannon. The nurse said Dr. Chaudhry would be in about one. They’ve already started decreasing some of her sedative medications.”
I look again at my sister. “Already?” Anxiety bubbles within me as I watch Julie’s chest rise and fall.
As Michelle nods and exits the room, leaving me alone with Julie, the beeps, blips, and swish of the door, I wrestle with what she just shared. I can’t help wondering what my mother has been through or feel guilty that I don’t know anything about my youngest sister.
I walk closer to the bed and ask, “Julie, what was Mrs. Lane talking about?”
No response.
Taking her free hand in mine, I continue speaking, “I’m scared for you to wake. What do you remember about Saturday night?” I fight tears as I smooth stray strands of her copper-colored hair away from her face. “Sheriff Manes is going to tell the town what happened. Mom pushed him. Don’t be upset with her. People need to know what happened for their safety. They need to catch this horrible man who hurt you, and...” I don’t think she can hear me. I’ve read studies about what people remember after waking from unconsciousness. Yet, Michelle said they’ve already started decreasing some of her medications. I don’t want to be the one to tell her about her friend. I swallow the tears I refuse to shed. “We’re all here for you, Julie. You’re not alone.”
She’s not. I know what loneliness feels like, even when it’s self-imposed.
“Julie, I don’t think you can hear me, but if you’ll listen to your older sister for just a minute, I say do as I say, not as I did. Mom, Dad, Olivia, and Ollie are all here. You’ve been through something horrific, and that doesn’t change the way your family cares, even me, Julie. I know I don’t say it, but I care. Let them. Don’t hide. It doesn’t really solve anything.” My voice trails away. “It makes it more difficult to return.”
As I’m about to step away, I reach out and place my palm against her cheek. Her skin is warm beneath my touch. With my pulse racing, I glance around the room. The door to the hallway is closed and while the drapes near the window are open and sunshine streams in,being on the fourth floor, there’s no risk that anyone can see us.
“Sorry, Julie,” I whisper as I use my thumb and first finger to lift one of her eyelids. The blue is barely present upon the white of her orb. I let out a breath and do the same to her other eye.
Both eyes are present and accounted for.
Yes, that was strange, but nothing since I’ve returned to Blue Gil has been normal.
What is normal?
An image of Becky and Hank embracing comes to mind.
