“Let’s go, then,” I say, heading for the back doors.
Hyacinth locks up the shop, and we go out from the dock to the parking lot. She doesn’t look at me once on the way over, or as we get in the car, and my heart sinks even further.
On the way home, I try to think of something to say, but her cold manner keeps me quiet. She looks out the window, keeping the back of her head to me as if she’s trying to block all conversation. The questions I need answers to just get louder and louder in my brain.
What happened to you? Something did, something bad. Someone hurt you, didn’t they? Who? How?
I swear, I’ll never let anyone hurt you again.
By the time we pull up at home, I’m exhausted again. I don’t know if it’s because of the evening I’ve had or the curse coming back to me. I know I’ll have to talk to the other alphas as well as Sadie and Trina about this, but I’m in no hurry for that.
How do I explain that I had a life-altering experience, and then half an hour later, it was like it didn’t even happen?
When I stop in the driveway, Hyacinth gets out and goes to stand by the door, waiting for me. I unlock it, and she shoves past, hurrying down the hallway.
“Hyacinth, wait, please,” I call after her. “Let me make you something to eat, or order in. We need to talk.”
“Talking isn’t going to change anything,” she says, turning to look at me. “It never does. Men just don’t fucking care. They do what they want, and women pay for it.”
Even though a retort is blistering on my tongue, there is also a deep sadness rising in my chest.
Something happened to her.
“Hyacinth, what happened to you?” I ask quietly. I take a few steps towards her, trying to keep my tone gentle.
Her eyes well with tears, and the sight of it is like a stiletto right through the heart.
“Don’t even pretend you care!” she snaps. “You brought me here against my will—you don’t care about me or what I need! You only care about yourself.”
“I care about my pack,” I reply.
She shakes her head, wiping tears from her cheeks.
“Don’t pretend you care about me, though,” she says. “Anything you’re doing right now is just to get back into my pants. God, I’m so stupid—why am I so stupid?”
“You’re not!” I yell, coming closer to her. “You’re not stupid. We felt something, both of us did. It had an impact on the curse—”
“Here we go again,” she sighs, shaking her head. “You lead in as if it’s about me, and us, but it’s really just about the curse. That’s all it’s ever about.”
“That’s not what I meant—”
“Whatever,” she whispers, her voice hoarse. “I’m going to have a shower and go to bed. Do whatever you like.”
I stand in the hallway and watch her go, trying to figure out if the weakness and pain in my chest is the return of the curse or a genuine response to Hyacinth’s emotional state.
I’m really beginning to believe something terrible happened to her, and that’s why she’s so afraid. But how can I help her if she won’t talk to me?
Chapter 20 - Hyacinth
Walking away from Shane in that moment is one of the most painful things I’ve ever done. The only thing that keeps me putting one foot in front of the other is the feeling that if I stay, the pain will be far worse.
That wasn’t love, what we did. It was just the curse. A rush of healing for Shane, and pure weakness from me.
I slam the bathroom door and lock it, trying to avoid thoughts of Shane as I get into the shower. But as the water trickles over my skin, it awakens every sensation. Slowly, I run my hands over my body. My skin is slick with soap as I explore every inch, small bruises bringing a rush of pleasure when I press lightly against them.
It’s wrong! After what Dan did to me, I should be furious, or terrified, or…
Tears streak down my cheeks, and I turn my face up to the warm spray of the water, obliterating them. The truth in my heart swells, so intense I can’t deny it a second longer.
