“It’s going to hurt, but not like giving birth twice must have hurt,” Stevie said and smiled. “Besides, we’ll take edibles and get you super chill.”
As I settled in the lush lawn stretching out behind the Sorority House, my girls drew flowers on the concrete. Stevie checked on her sister before joining me on the grass.
“Rumor has it that you might have a thing for Boone,” Stevie whispered.
Gasping was the wrong choice, but I couldn’t help myself. Romance seemed so easy in the books I read. I wasn’t as interested in romantic movies. I liked to picture people in my head more. They became realer that way.
But theyweren’treal, and romance didn’t work like it did in books.
“Want me to set you guys up?”
“No.”
“How come?”
“He’s not my type.”
Cocking an eyebrow, she asked, “Are you not into hot guys?”
“I don’t know.”
“Boone’s a grumpy dickhead, but also really sweet. I bet he’d treat you nicely. I mean, if he didn’t, the foxes would kick his ass.”
“I don’t know. I feel like dating would be a mistake.”
“You know, I nearly died earlier this year,” Stevie said. “I nearly lost my sister, too. And Lula was stolen away. So much bad stuff happened. It was all so sudden. We had walked into that parking garage dozens of times. That day felt like any other. Things can change so fast.”
Stevie leaned in and hugged me. “You know how that feels, don’t you? You were just living your life when a psycho shot you.”
Nodding, I thought back to the day when I was nearly killed at the grocery store. My girls were in the back seat. I hadn’t noticed the man approaching me while I moved my groceries from the cart to my SUV’s cargo space. I felt the pain before I registered the gunshot.
Shivering with the memory, I leaned into Stevie’s hug. Her fingers brushed over the scar hidden under my shirt.
“You need to grab hold of life and make it your bitch,” Stevie whispered. “If you’re hot for Boone, talk him up. Or let me push you two together.”
“What if we don’t get along?”
“Then, you look for someone else. Not everyone is like your brother, who ruts with the first woman to interest him. You might date a dozen guys before you find a keeper.”
“What if I don’t want to keep a man?”
“Then slut it up,” Stevie said, making me laugh. “There’s no harm in using men for the fun stuff and bailing when the relationships get boring. Just have fun.”
Stevie’s words stuck with me. She wasn’t the first fox to push for me to make a move. Elle more than once mentioned Boone’s great qualities before giving me an exaggerated wink.
Despite their encouragement, I still fought my urge to flirt with Boone. He had dropped by Lula’s house more than once without me giving him any special attention. I was afraid he wasn’t interested. If Boone knew I was, he might feel awkward coming around me. Better for me to dream of a romance than take my shot and look stupid.
My inner chicken was also why I didn’t get the tattoo before the wedding. I kept coming up with excuses to avoid pain and possible regret. Deep down inside, I was afraid I wouldn’t like the tattoo, or people would make fun of it. All my old bad habits swallowed me up until I was too afraid to try anything.
During the wedding at the Sorority House, I remained focused on Dan and Lula. The girls were excited to be flower girls like Lula’s twelve-year-old daughter, Dillon. The event was so beautiful, and I’d never seen Dan so happy.
The romance in the air inspired me to consider slipping a paper face of Eddie Murphy into Boone’s jacket. The actor’s movies had helped Dan and I bond after I moved to Baton Rouge.
Eventually, I started hiding the little paper faces in Dan’s clothes or under his bowl at dinner. After moving to Little Memphis, I began doing the same thing with Lula and Dillon. I usually walked around with a handful of the paper faces in my purse.
Rather than do something silly, I considered walking up and talking to him. Each time I got near Boone, I chickened out because I wasn’t a wild fox. I wasn’t even a nice girl getting her second chance like in my romance books. I was the messed-up daughter of a monster and the woman who loved him.
Laverne might have married twice after divorcing my dad, but she never got over Dan Senior. Her heart had been frozen in the past.Was I destined to the same fate?
