“You got a priest on staff?” I ask.
Clearly, my attempt at a joke goes right over her head because she just stares at me blankly.
Okay then.
I take one last bite of toast before I stand up and follow her to the video room. Taking a seat in front of the green screen, I look at the camera as she sits to one side behind it.
“So, Courtney. Last night was an emotional time. How are you?”
“Fine,” I say stiffly.
She’s quiet for a moment, then comes at it from a different way. “Explain to the audience what you’re feeling. What did you feel in that moment when Noah agreed to lock in with Savannah?”
I press my tongue to the inside of my cheek and shake my head. “I felt… pissed.”
“Okay… what else?” she pushes.
I stay silent, so she whispers to someone before handing me a tablet. I click on what looks like a video and a dark room appears. It’s one of the bunk rooms and clearly at night. The first thing I hear are moans, followed by Noah saying my name and Savannah laughing, confirming it’s not me. I watch with rapt attention as Noah then not only lets her continue but fucks her face. The angles on the camera are just right so nothing is graphic, but the noises Savannah’s making leave nothing to the imagination.
When the video ends, I hand them back the tablet.
“How does seeing that first-hand make you feel?” the woman asks.
I know they want me to break down on camera. They want me to become this sappy mess because it will make things more dramatic. Normally, I’d rather swallow a bucket of nails than let my emotions show in front of others, but I don’t even have to fake it for the show. My chest feels like it’s being ripped in two, and tears pour down my face as I look straight into the camera.
“I’m hurt. I came here not expecting much, especially not expecting to find a connection so soon,” I say, my tone eerily hollow and stiff despite the streams of tears soaking my cheeks. “I let my guard down too quickly, and now I’m paying the price.”
“He betrayed you, didn’t he?” the woman asks.
“Yeah, it feels like a betrayal. Sure as hell looks like one.” I laugh bitterly.
She nods sympathetically, or at least tries to appear sympathetic. I don’t buy it for one moment, honestly.
“You’re locked in with Landon now. Some would say you two have gotten off to a rocky start. Why did you choose him overCalvin?”
I think over my answer for a moment before I give the camera a shrug and the best smile I can muster.
“You know what they say, the line between hate and love is extremely thin.”
She smiles like that was the perfect thing to say before she nods and gestures for me to leave.
Thank God.
After I left the confessional room, I went back to my room to clean up the streams of mascara that streaked my face. I’m just finishing touching up my foundation when a knock sounds on the bedroom door. Hell, now what?
A camera guy pops his head in the room and smiles tightly. “Sorry. We need everyone outside.”
“Any spoilers you can give me on what to expect? I’m about sick of surprises at this point.”
He looks me up and down and shrugs. “You’re on the wrong show then, honey.”
With that, he’s gone, and I’m sighing as I look into the mirror. Yep. Figured as much.
When I make it outside, everyone is gathered around in a semicircle facing Alex, and all eyes are on me as I begrudgingly move to stand next to Landon. He doesn’t acknowledge me, and I don’t acknowledge him.
“Alright. We’re getting started today with your first challenge. We’ll go over all the details offscreen, so we’re just going to shoot the hot lines now.”
We all nod, and Daryll counts us down before Alex jumps into his over-the-top persona.
