I want to yell at him and tell him to shut up. I want to tell him he is killing the buzz but I can’t seem to lie, not in this moment. I can’t ignore the emotions racing through me. My words will say it, but my eyes, they won’t lie.
“But it doesn’t change anything,” I confess and all he does is smile.
“You’re wrong Kendall, it changes everything.”
With one quick swoop his pants are pushed down and he is entering me, with nothing between us. I know I should stop him, not because I’m afraid of any STD, but because this, it’s too much. I’ve given this to no one, the part of me that leaves no barrier.
Tears fill my eyes and I am quick to close them, knowing that I have to hide this vulnerability. I can’t be this weak. I can never give a man control over me again, I won’t. I am in control, damnit I am in control.
Aaron moves with expert thrusts, every single time drawing out something in me that scares the hell out of me. I feel him everywhere, in every part of my body. Like he is part of me, inside me, reading me like a book. I don’t have to ask, I don’t have to demand, because the man just knows.
My God he knows me more than anyone else has, and I still have no idea how.
We’ve never shared a deep conversation about our wants and needs. But if there is such a thing as the perfect match, I can only admit to myself and only me, that Aaron is mine.
And now more than ever I want to run!
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Aaron
“Where didyou run off to the other night?” Bennett asks, handing me a box of screws.
“When?”
“Dude, your nonchalant act fucking sucks.” He chuckles. “Two nights ago when you stopped in at the bar, found out Kendall wasn’t there, and took off. I tried calling you three times and I’m assuming you didn’t answer because you had other things going on. So I’m asking, but already knowing. Where did you run off to?”
“If you know then why are you asking?”
“Because the version I overheard is always filtered and one-sided. You want to take this time to clear things up?”
“Nah,” I say with a smile he can’t see. My back is to him as I hold the deck board down and drive in a few screws to hold it in place.
“Nah,” he repeats and I can hear the displeasure in his voice. “So are you telling me you showed up to the shop, begged and pleaded for a chance, and she slammed the door in your face?”
I pause and look back over my shoulder. The fucker is staring at me with a straight face. “Is that really the version you got?”
“That and you sat in your truck outside the shop for an hour hoping she’d reconsider while blowing her phone up with text messages.”
Bennett doesn’t bluff, he’s never been good at it. But right now, I can’t decide if he’s gotten better at it, or if he’s being honest. So I test the waters. “It was actually more like an hour and a half and she didn’t shut the door in my face, she never even opened it.”
Shrugging I turn back to the pile of deck boards and pull over another.
“That figures, because I knew the version I heard couldn’t be the actual truth.”
Smiling I realize the fucker has gotten better at bluffing and I flip him off only to be met by his chuckles.
“No way in hell did you manage to rattle Kendall to the point of complete and utter confusion.”
I glance back to find him smiling.
“No wait, it wasn’t rattled, it was kabobbled.”
“What?” It’s my turn to laugh.
“She was kabobbled.” He nods as if ensuring he remembered the word right. “You’ve got her head kabobbled and she thinks she might have a brain tumor because no way is any man capable of getting her all twisted up.”
Bennett rambles on a bit more but honestly I barely hear a word he is saying. I am too hung up on the idea of Kendall admitting that there was something about this thing with her and I that left her feeling flipped upside down. I was there too, nothing was clear anymore.
