“Why are you avoiding the answer?” he fires back quickly not even taking a moment to consider how ridiculous this actually is.
“Fine,” I say, knowing that I am backed in a corner, “yes we have.”
“Recently?”
I stare at him.
“How recent?” he pushes a little harder and I can feel my self losing control.
“After you were with me?”
“No,” I blurt out, “it’s been a few months.”
“So I’m not supposed to get a little bothered by the idea of you there with him, while he’s half naked?”
“This is ridiculous and the exact reason why I am not good at this shit. I don’t do jealousy.” I don’t do drama, I hate it all. I hate having to answer to anyone for anything.
“So you weren’t a little jealous by me being with Chelsea?”
“Please.” I shouldn’t laugh but I can’t seem to gain some control. “That girl didn’t have a chance with you. She was like a little schoolgirl and I knew right from the start there was nothing there.”
Aaron holds my stare. “Does it make you feel good knowing that since the moment I was with you there isn’t a chance for anyone else? Does that give you some kind of power rush knowing you’ve fucked me up for anyone else, while I take the scraps you throw my way? You dangling me around by a fucking string and I’m supposed to be okay with the little you are willing to offer.”
“I told you from the beginning I wouldn’t be good at this."
“Yeah you did,” he admits and I feel my stomach tighten. “But what you didn’t say is that you wouldn’t even try. In fact you said the exact opposite.”
“Yeah I did.”
“So fucking try, Kendall!” Aaron’s voice rises which surprises me. But that is what I do. I piss people off, I push them to theirbreaking point because I feel like it’s the only way I can maintain control.
“I am,” I respond with just as much irritation in my voice. Hating that we are here, doing what we are doing and feeling awful for it. I hate doing this to him, I hate doing this to me.
He nods, and something about it grates on my nerves. “Sure you are.” And with those words he turns around and attempts to close the door.
Without a second to think it through I react and stick my hand out to stop him. I’m going to slowly destroy a very good man and I should walk away now, only everything inside of me fears the thought I never having him touch me again.
“I don’t want to lose myself because I get so wrapped up in you,” I confess as anxiety fills me from head to toe, but I push through. “Because I see that happening, Aaron. I see myself giving everything to you and in the end, I forget who I truly am.”
His features soften, only a fraction but enough for me to notice. A softer look in his eyes and the tension in his shoulders slowly fades. “Impossible, because I wouldn’t let you do that.”
He holds my stare as he reaches out to touch my arm and I take a step toward him.
“Then help me maneuver through this.” My heart races. “Help me figure it out. Because I have no clue what I am doing.”
“Do you know how hard it is to help someone that isn’t willing to bend, not even little?”
“I’m here aren’t I?”
Aaron’s palm slides over my arm soothingly. “Now, you are here now. But an hour ago you were running.”
“An hour ago I was pissed and ready to drive through your front door with the tow truck.”
He chuckles.
“You laugh, but it’s true.”
“Well I’m glad you left the tow truck at the shop.”
