For a while, I loved the novelty of Cory’s wolf and the fact that I got to be in on the secret. I was one of the special few who got to peek behind the curtain and view the spectacular hidden nature of our world.
But then things changed.
I think the first red flag, though I didn’t notice it at the time, was when I met Cory’s half-brother, Larson. The guy might have been older than Cory by two years, but he gave off the air of a younger brother seeking approval. Which might have been because the man was fully human.
The way Larson acted around Cory was a strange kind of hero worship. It was only after Cory started getting rough with me that I saw the way Larson would flinch when his brother made a sudden move. Doesn’t matter if you’re a big, tall human. A werewolf will always be stronger.
The change in Cory didn’t come like the flick of a switch, but rather like the boiling of water. Small things that built biggeruntil I was trapped without having felt the water grow scalding against my skin.
One of the ways he hurt me was with his wolf. A side of him that had at first filled me with wonder, he slowly twisted into an object of fear.
Another in a long list of reasons to hate him.
Now I want to rediscover that wonder I once had.
Carefully, I step over a broken section of the fence. Damp grass crunches under the sneakers Tanya was kind enough to let me borrow for the evening.
The world around the two of us is dark and filled with the soft noises of the forest at night. In any other case, I might fear this partial blindness, but my wolf’s hand in mine lets me enjoy the beauty of this haunting setting. Once we circle my house, we find the partially full moon cresting over the trees. The dim glow helps my eyes to adjust.
“I’ll sit here. You take your time.” I let go of Roderick’s hand, giving him an encouraging push toward the center of my yard before I move to sit on the top step of my back porch.
The wood is old and warped, plucking at threads in my sweater dress. Chilly air raises goose bumps on my legs, and I rub my hands over my thighs in an attempt to warm them.
“You sure?”
At Roderick’s question, I flick my eyes back to him, finding the man methodically removing his clothes.
Maybe we could just go straight to my bedroom …
No! I need to do this. I want to do this.
“I’m sure.”
He nods, then tugs off his boxer briefs, standing before me completely naked. Though his muscles are tense, I don’t think the cold is bothering him in the slightest.
Roderick stares at me for another moment, and I watch his chest expand on a deep, bracing breath.
The air around us starts to feel heavy, and I spy the familiar shifting of shadows.
Don’t freak out,I coach myself. This is Roderick. He won’t hurt me.
Darkness clings to his skin, enveloping him. My ears itch from the shift in air pressure, and I reach up to rub them. Then, just like riding a fast-ascending plane, my eardrums pop. The inky cloud around Roderick dissipates.
And I stare into the eyes of a wolf.
Air stutters in my throat.
Roderick. Roderick. Roderick,I chant to myself to stave off potential panic.
And then, because I’m not sure it’s working, I let his name spill out.
“Roderick. Roderick. Roderick …”
Maybe it’s the mantra, or maybe it’s the fact that I watched him turn, but my mind doesn’t overlay a memory of my ex on this moment. Instead, I’m able to sit still, breathing steadily, if a bit heavily.
Roderick the wolf takes a seat, keeping a good ten feet between us, waiting to see what my reaction is.
He and Cory may be the same species, but the differences between them become clearer every day that passes. They don’t even resemble one another in this form.
