Page 93 of To Have and to Hate


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He doesn’t call back until I’m in bed, scrolling through Reddit on my phone.

I answer immediately, relief flooding me.

“Boy we suck at this.”

He sighs as a door slams in the background. “I just walked into my hotel room. God, it’s been a long day.”

I imagine him tugging a hand through his hair, exhausted.

“Have you had dinner?” I ask.

“I’m about to order room service.”

“Oh. I could let you go so you—”

“Elizabeth.”

“I was just—”

“Yeah, I know what you were doing, and I don’t care. We’re not getting off this phone until you’ve heard me out.”

I sit up in bed, settling back against the pillows.

“But just give me two seconds. Where’s their goddamn menu?” I hear him shuffling around as he grabs the hotel’s phone, then the telltale sound of him dialing down for room service. Someone must answer fairly quickly because Walt speaks right away, ordering a cheeseburger.

They must ask about a drink because Walt responds with, “Water’s fine. Add a salad on the side, please. Whatever house dressing you have is good.”

There’s silence for a moment, and then he thanks the person on the other end of the line and hangs up.

“Elizabeth? You there?”

“Yes.”

“Right. That should take them about two hours to bring up.”

I smile. “Why does room service always take forever?”

“I have no idea, but it’s a universal law. Hang on, let me change out of my suit. I’ve been in it all day. Ugh, I could use a shower.”

“So shower.”

“Right, and chance losing you?”

“I’ll stay on the phone, I swear.”

“Fine, but I’m bringing you into the bathroom with me,” he says.

I listen to a door open and then the shower turns on. Water sprays against tile and glass, which means he must be in a really nice hotel. No plastic beige shower curtain for him.

“Can you hear me?” he asks.

“Barely.”

“I’ll be quick.”

It’s acute torture to stay on the phone with Walt, listening as he strips off his clothes. My ears prick with every tiny sound: a zipper sliding, clothes bunching, the ting of metal hitting tile. The sound of the shower grows louder as he opens the door and steps inside. His body partially blocks the stream, deadening the sound. I close my eyes and listen, imagining what he looks like, water dripping over his muscles as he lathers up his body.

Another few minutes pass like this and I wriggle with impatience on my bed, trying to ignore the fact that my cheeks are starting to grow hot.

The water cuts off and the shower door opens again. A new mental image replaces the last: Walt stepping out of the shower, glistening, naked, and clean. Water drips from his dark hair, droplets rolling down his neck and chest. I hear him whip open a towel and start to dry off.

“Elizabeth?”

I tug on a stray piece of thread on the top sheet.

“I’m here.”

“Good. Let me grab some clothes.”

“Was this all part of your ploy?” I ask, only partly teasing.

“What?”

“To get me on the phone and make me listen to that?”

He chuckles. “It was all done in innocence, I assure you. Though to be fair, I would have never been able to listen if the situation were reversed.”

A shiver runs down my spine, and instead of tempting me further into illicit topics, it forces me back to the task at hand.

“You wanted to speak to me about the other day? Clear things up?” I ask, my tone shifting to something a bit more serious.

“Yes, though I’m not sure how to launch into it like this. It feels so strange to be talking to you this way. I wish you could come to California. Can you? Come? I’ll be here until Sunday.”

A laugh tumbles out of me because it’s so absurd. “No. I…no, Walt. I’m actually flying to Paris on Saturday.”

Nadiya’s assistant sent over my confirmation number and flight details earlier this afternoon.

“Paris?” he asks, sounding taken aback, and well, it makes sense.

“Yes. For my show with Stein Gallery.”

“What show?”

I explain to him the change in schedule, how Nadiya placed me in the slot that was previously filled, unable to keep the smile off my face as I go over the details. Even after everything, it feels good to share this with him. I realize now he’s the only person I wanted to tell.

“It’s been a little bit of a whirlwind, actually. I only found out about this yesterday, so I’m trying to finalize everything as quickly as I can.”

“That’s…” His voice trails off as if he’s not sure what to say. “Elizabeth, that’s… Congratulations. You should be really proud of yourself.”

“I am. Yeah. Thank you.”

“How long will you be there?”

“A week, I think. Just enough time to help with final decisions about the show, and then actually attend, of course. There’s some press I have to do, nothing major, but yeah…”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, it’s going to be a lot of work.”

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