~~~~~~~/~~~~~~~
The first letter Darcy wrote addressed everything, but it was angry, and he did not want to deliver a letter written in anger.
By the time Richard sauntered into Darcy’s bedchamber, there were balls of crumpled up paper all over the place. “William, I can see that something has greatly upset your equanimity, what is it?”
“Richard, I need to write this letter. On my word of honour, I will tell you, but just not tonight.” Darcy felt he could not hide the decision he had just made from Richard. “I will be taking my leave on the morrow. I intend to stop in London for a few days. I will leave Anna in your parents’ care for now. I will, of course, see her, while I am in Town, but then, I will be for Pemberley. I have been away from my estate for far too long.”
Fitzwilliam had a suspicion that his cousin’s hasty retreat before dinner, his mood on his return, and his decision to depart on the morrow were connected to Miss Elizabeth Bennet. He would honour William’s desire to tell him later. He gave his cousin a clap on his back and made his way to his own bedchamber.
Daybreak was not far off by the time Darcy completed a letter with which he was happy.
He did not bother to sleep. As the dawn approached, he rang for Carstens and prepared to walk out after telling his valet to begin packing for departure. As dawn’s first light became visible, Darcy was on his way to the clearing where the paths Miss Bennet walked all crossed.
All he could do was hope Miss Bennet would walk out today.
Chapter9
Elizabeth was extremely agitated because she needed to take her walk to calm herself, but what if the hateful man who had made the worst proposal she could imagine—even worse than Mr Collins’s, something she had not thought possible—was waiting for her again. She could not bear seeing him.
There was no question that her decision to reject Mr Darcy’s offer of marriage was the correct one, but after very little sleep the previous night, she had become mortified by the manner of her refusal.
No matter what Mr Darcy had done, she should have remained polite. She let her temper get the better of her and for that she felt remorse.
She reminded herself that she did not allow anyone to intimidate her. With that in mind, Elizabeth resolved to walk out; her bruised spirit required it. As she had each day since arriving at the parsonage, Elizabeth dressed herself, tied her hair in a simple knot, laced up her half-boots she always walked in, took her bonnet, and lastly slipped her hands into the gloves she used when walking. She walked softly down the stairs and out of the parsonage. As soon as she crossed the estate’s drive, Elizabeth headed into the grove. She walked with no little trepidation as she approached the spot Mr Darcy usually waited for her. He was not there! Her mood lightened significantly.
Feeling the tension leach out of her body with each step, she felt almost ebullient as she walked. That all changed when she reached the clearing where she would either walk up thehill to the folly or turn towards the other grove to reach the glade. There stood the last man she wanted to see. Luck was with her; his back was to her. Elizabeth turned to go back the way she had come when she trod on a little branch which had fallen from one of the trees. To her horror, it made a loud cracking noise as it splintered below her half-boot.
Darcy had been waiting since first light and had not been sure Miss Bennet would walk out today. He had been contemplating his choices, and how rather than keeping to his maxim of hating disguise, he had been employing it too often of late. While he was lost in thought, he heard the sound from behind him and spun around. There was Miss Bennet, and it seemed she was about to slink away.
He now understood that the woman he loved held him in no tender regard, in fact, she hated him! As such, Darcy could understand why she did not want to see him; but it was too important that she learn that he was not the villain she thought he was.
“Miss Bennet, good morning,” Darcy said evenly.
As she had been castigating herself for her rudeness in her rejection of Mr Darcy’s proposal, Elizabeth knew she could not ignore him now. She turned and faced him. He looked as grave as ever. “And to you, Mr Darcy,” she returned with a curtsy. She watched as Mr Darcy approached and came to stand about two feet from her.
“Miss Bennet, will you do me the honour of reading this letter,” Darcy requested after he extracted the epistle from his inside coat pocket.
“Mr Darcy if you think you will gain me as a wife via a compromise…” Elizabeth stopped herself, she was about to give into her temper again. This man had that effect on her. “Pardon my harsh response. What I meant to say is that it is very improper for you to offer me a missive and for me to accept it.”
“I do not dispute your words about propriety. However, all I beg of you is that you read what I have written if, as I believe you do, you have a sense of fairness. You laid many charges at my door, some justified, but many not. You judged me without ever allowing me to defend myself and answer the charges you accused me of.”
“Then, Mr Darcy, you are free to speak; why the need for a letter?”
“Miss Bennet, after my performance yester-evening, I think you may understand that I am not very articulate at the best of times, and especially when I am overset. I cannot force you to accept the epistle, and if you do, I have no way to compel you to read the words within. All I can assure you is unlike the person who you championed; I have proof and witnesses to prove my words are true. Please, Miss Bennet, regardless of how you see me, surely you want to know the truth?”
Elizabeth cogitated for a few moments. Mr Darcy stood there, the missive in his hand waiting patiently. She had to admit that she was inquisitive about what Mr Darcy had written, and if she were to be honest, she saw no pride in him now; in fact, he was being humble. A decision made, she extended her hand. “I will read your words, Mr Darcy, but I cannot promise I will believe them.”
Darcy handed her the epistle. “Reading them is the only thing I had hoped for. Thank you, Miss Bennet. May God bless you.” He bowed and then started walking back towards the mansion.
It took some minutes before Elizabeth got her legs to move. She could not read the letter at the parsonage, so she walked over to the long-felled tree trunk and took a seat on it. She broke the seal; the large raised ‘D’ surrounded by laurels in the wax led her to assume it was the Darcy seal. She opened thepages and began to read.
29 March 1812
Miss Elizabeth Bennet:
Be not alarmed, madam, on receiving this letter, by the apprehension of its containing any repetition of those sentiments or renewal of those offers which were this evening so disgusting to you.
Before I mention anything else, let me inform you that after I hand this missive to you I will depart Rosings Park. My family, which includes Colonel Fitzwilliam, will remain as there are family issues which need to be dealt with. More on this later. My decision to leave now is driven by my desire not to discompose you any more than I have. I think we both need time and distance, and as I am the one who is able to travel without any effort, soon after you read this, I will be on my way.
