“Please just call me Jackie. I was wondering, can I use my phone?”
“Yes, Jackie. You can use your phone. Do you need the Wi-Fi password?”
“There’s Wi-Fi on here?”
“Oh yes, the Gallants wouldn’t travel without it.”
“Of course. But I should be good. Thank you, though.”
Me: We’re in the air. I’m freaking out.
Cheri: Did you take the pill?
Me: Do dogs bark? Yeah, I took it.
Cheri: It takes about a half hour to work. You should start feeling calmer soon.
Me: I hope so. My fingernails are going to leave permanent indentations in these armrests.
Cheri:
What the fuck? She thinks I’m kidding?
Me: I’m not kidding.
Cheri: Oops! Sorry, Jac. Tell me about the plane. Is it one of those tiny six-seaters?
Me: Nope. You’d love it. It’s huge. There are couches and a flight attendant and everything.
Cheri: So why are you so nervous?
Me: I’m alone on this huge plane with just the pilots and maybe a co-pilot, and Laura the flight attendant. What if something happens to the pilot? Who the fuck will fly this metal box?
Cheri: Shit, girl. You need to calm down. Seriously. I used to fly all the time. It’s safer than driving.
Me: Yeah, well. I don’t do that either, remember?
Cheri: One of these days, we’re going to fix that.
Me: No, thank you. I’m perfectly happy taking mass transit.
Cheri: Whatevs. You took the pill, so don’t drink.
Me: Yes, Mom. I wasn’t going to. I’d probably vomit. I might do that anyway.
Cheri: Just give the pill a chance to work. You’ll feel better soon.
Me: I hope you’re right.
Cheri: You’re going to call me when you get there, right?
Me: That’s the plan. Unless I don’t have any service. They live out in the middle of nowhere. I don’t even know where exactly.
Cheri: I thought you knew?
Me: Why would I? It’s not like employees ever go there. Until now. Why did I have to be the first one?
Cheri: Maybe he wants to give you a promotion for figuring out an issue? Did you ever think of that? Not everything is negative.
