Mr. Darcy’s Quiet Strength
One
Pemberley, 1799
“Come and sit next to me, my dearest son. I would like a word alone with you if you do not mind.”
“There is nothing that makes me happier than talking to you, Mother.”
“It saddens me to hear that, my darling. Even though I treasure every moment I spend with you, I would like to see many other things make you happy, Fitzwilliam. You are so young, yet there is rarely a smile on your handsome face. I sometimes wonder whether there is something troubling you.”
“I shall smile more when I see you regaining your strength, Mother. When I see you healthy, nothing will trouble me.”
The woman took the boy’s hand and caressed it, then kissed it.
“My dearest, you are a young man now. We both know I shall not recover. My only hope is to have a little more time to see Georgiana grow up. She is only three years old.”
“I pray you will see her grow up, Mother,” the boy said, his voice heavy with tears. “Papa said he will engage more doctors,and the medicine from India should arrive soon. We will find a way!”
“I shall do whatever the doctors advise me if it will give me a little more time with you, Fitzwilliam. But if things worsen, I wish you not to suffer too much for me, my son. I have been happier than most people are in much longer lives. Having you as my son has been the greatest blessing one can hope for.”
The young man lowered his head to conceal his tears, his hand still clasped in his mother’s.
“Fitzwilliam, there is something of great importance I wish to ask you. I know it might be unfair, that it might be selfish of me, and that it might burden you even more…”
“You may ask me anything, Mother!”
“You have a sharp mind, a strong character, and a kind heart, Fitzwilliam. Your strength — though mostly quiet — is deeper and more significant than that of many gentlemen I know. I am begging you to use that strength to help your father and to support your sister when I am gone. There is no better man than your father, nor more loving husband…or better landlord.”
“That is true, Mother.”
“But he has changed in recent years, since my illness. His goodness and loyalty to me make him feel lost, and his strengths are slowly diminishing. It pains me to see him like this, as he is still a young man. He should live happily even when I am gone.”
“None of us will live happily if you are gone, Mother.”
“Oh, do not say that, silly boy! In fact, you must promise me you will make yourself a very happy life! You must find a woman worthy of you. A woman I could love because she loves you. A woman you admire and who makes your heart race. You have everything you need, Fitzwilliam, and there are so few things you lack. So find a woman who will complete what is missing in your life.”
“Finding a woman is the last thing in the world that concerns me now, Mother. But I promise I shall not forget your words. I still pray you will have the chance to grant her your approval when the time comes.”
“Then — do you promise that you will take care of your father and sister?”
“I promise! But Papa insists that I go to Cambridge, although I should better stay home and help him with his duties.”
“Your father is right, as always. You should complete your education before you take all those responsibilities on your shoulders. The burden will not be easy.”
“Nothing related to our family would be a burden, Mother. I am proud and grateful to follow in my father’s footsteps.”
“I know you are, my son. And speaking of pride,” she added, smiling at him, “there are already some people who call you proud, and there will be many in the future if your manners remain the same.”
“Do you disapprove of my manners, Mother?”
“Oh no, not at all! I would not change a single thing about you! I just wish you to be aware that your serious and reserved manners make you different from other young men your age, especially those like your cousin Geoffrey or George Wickham, whose nature is open and engaging. Some people might call you proud, even arrogant and haughty.”
“I cannot be concerned with the opinion of people who do not know me. But Father seems to enjoy George’s company, so I assume he favours his manners over mine.”
“Oh no, your father favours nobody over you. He does enjoy the boy’s company because George amuses him. He is such a joyful, friendly boy and most grateful to your father.”
The young man did not reply, and his mother continued.
