“I don’t have to lie when you’re so good at doing it.”
“Dammit, Skyler!” Trevor stood, kicking his bag hard enough to send it sliding a few feet across the floor.
Skyler flinched. He’d always thought Trevor had endless patience, but apparently not. Though maybe that was good. It wasn’t that he wanted Trevorto get mad at him, but he wanted something. Maybe just an acknowledgement that what their management was doing to them was bullshit.
Sure, they were incredibly lucky to be where they were, but the strains on their relationship were getting worse. And he was sick of Trevor pretending everything was fine.
So he pushed some more. “I’m only saying. Not being a liar is a good thing, isn’t it?”
Trevor gave him a look like he was disgusted with him. Only for a second, and then it was gone. And it was okay. Skyler didn’t mind because he pretty much deserved it. Then Trevor took a deep breath and said, “But is it necessary to let the world know everything you’re thinking at all times?”
He furrowed his brow, not following.
“Even without you saying anything out loud today, your face still said plenty. You scrunched up your nose like you were ten seconds away from punching the host in the face. Or punching me in the face. Or maybe flipping over your chair and storming off set.”
There is nothing going on with us. Come on, that’s ridiculous.
“You know some people are going to over-analyze the hell out of every second of that interview,” Trevor went on, “trying to prove we were lying. Fans think we’re being forced to say this shit.”
“We are being forced!” Skyler snapped.
“So then why are you mad at me about it?”
“I’m not mad!”Lie. “And I’m sorry I can’t control my face when I have to hear my boyfriend tell the world that being with me is ridiculous!”
Instantly, Trevor’s face fell. Everything about him softened as he stepped closer. “Oh no. No, Sky, don’t. Please. I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry I had to say that, but you know how hard Maggie was on my case telling me I’d better make it believable.”
Trevor reached out and tried to touch his face, but Skyler shrank back. He knew he was being unreasonable—knew Trevor was only doing what he had to—but he wasn’t ready to let it go yet. Wasn't ready to be coddled and let Trevor show him how much he loved him.
Because he knew. He did. And he remembered Trevor giving him their signal during the interview after he’d said that stuff, but it wasn’t enough to make it hurt less.
Their situation really sucked sometimes. And he was allowed to feel how he felt for a bit without being reasonable about it, okay?
“You don’t want me to touch you now?” Trevor asked sadly.
And Skyler came so close to caving. But then his phone dinged in his pocket, and he knew without looking at it what it meant. “I have to go.”
“Wait, no.” Trevor shook his head. “Don’t leave mad. Please.”
“I’m not mad,” he only half-lied this time. “I have a date, remember?”
Trevor’s mouth dropped open until understanding dawned in his eyes. Then he pressed his lips together in a thin line and simply nodded.
Skyler knew it was messed up to call this stupid obligation a date. They never called them that. He hadn’t intentionally meant for it to hurt Trevor, but he was still in a bad mood.
And even if none of this was actually Trevor’s fault, Skyler didn’t have time to apologize for real. Not the way he should. So he just mumbled a, “Sorry,” and stepped around Trevor to get to the door.
As his fingers hit the handle, he heard Trevor say, “I love you.”
He paused, turned. Whether or not he was mad, he had to say it back. He could nevernotsay it back.
“I love you too.”
He went back to give Trevor a quick kiss, and then he left because he really did need to. There was an uncomfortable ache in his chest as security escorted him to his waiting car, and it didn’t ease while he sat in the backseat replaying all his childish words for the entire drive.
This wasn’t how everything was supposed to be.
It was awful to leave like that, with a fight unresolved. But what else could he do? They hadn’t had time to make up. Lately, they didn’t have time for a lot of things. And that was the price they paid for their careers, right?
