Truthfully, neither of them was the one to really end their relationship. Not officially. Neither of them issued the final blow. Things became rockier and rockier until suddenly it was over. They didn’t end it—it just ended.
But as they hold each other in this bed, ten years and three thousand miles away from the first bed they shared, Trevor can tell they’re both silently promising the same thing. That they’ll do it better now. That they’ll love and take care of each other always. No matter what bullshit tries to get between them, they won’t give up.
They have so much more control over their own lives now. They can make it work this time.
Courtney had a fieldday when Trevor agreed to do the interview. She promised he was making a smart decision, gave him a rundown of the kinds of questions he’d be asked, and also assured him it’d be fine to bring Skyler with him and that the studio was guaranteeing them discretion.
And Trevor definitely needed Skyler’s support for this. Back in the greenroom, fifteen minutes before he was due to be introduced on set, he freaked out so badly he almost left. But Skyler held his hand and wouldn’t let him run. He cradled Trevor’s head to his chest and murmured sweet nonsense until Trevor went pliant in his arms.
If it wasn’t for Skyler, he wouldn’t be sitting under bright lighting right now, in a plush armchair beside a large desk, with Miles Morales behind it grinning at him. And while he’s still not entirely sure he wants to be here, he can’t deny it felt good when he walked out to the sound of the whole studio audience clapping for him. They’re instructed to clap for everyone, so who knows if any of them are really even fans of his, but still.
He’d prefer to talk only about his music, but it’s not like he didn’t know it was coming when Miles brings up Skyler covering his song for the Radio 505 acoustic set. So he smiles to disguise his racing heart and gives his prepared response. “Skyler is obviously an incredible musician, and I’m honored he likes my song enough to want to sing it.”
“I think it’s pretty clear from the way he sang it,” Miles says, leaning in conspiratorially, “that he doesn’t just like it. I’d wager he feels a rather deep connection to it.”
Trevor digs the tip of his pinkie into the side of his thigh. What’s he supposed to say to that? “Maybe he does. As artists, if we choose to sing a song that’s not our own, it’s often because we connect with it.”
When Miles chuckles, it sounds so fake Trevor almost cringes. “Sure, sure. But after hearing Skyler admit he was in love with you, I’ve got to wonder if when he sang “Haunted,” he wasn’t simply singing your song, but singingaboutyou.”
“That might be a bit of a stretch, but I’m not in a position to say I know for sure what he was thinking.”
Miles hums like he’s considering his answer and waiting for him to say more. Trevor’s posture’s gone rigid, so he tries to correct it by leaning back in his seat and slinging one ankle over his knee. Miles isn’t asking him to confirmhisfeelings for Skyler, but bringing up Skyler’s feelings for him still seems like a trap.
And Skyler’s literally here, watching and waiting for him in the greenroom, and Trevor’s sure Miles knows that. Half the staff here probably know. Miles can’t mention it—he knows what he’s allowed and not allowed to ask—but he’s going to push Trevor to see what he can get out of him.
Trevor’s so sick of these charades. He had enough of them back in the band days.
“Look,” he says, using all his media training to keep his composure. “Everyone knows Skyler and I were close way back then, and because of that, he’ll always hold a place in my heart.” The mildly surprised look on Miles’ face tells him he probably should have used a different phrase, but he pushes through. “But the Boys Will Be Boys chapter of my life has long been closed, so if you don’t mind, I’d rather talk about the future.”
“Yes, please do,” Miles says, waving a hand for him to go on. “We’d all like to hear about what’s coming next for you.”
Okay, good. They’ve gotten back on track.
“Well, I haven’t exactly been writing yet, but I’ve been thinking about writing, which is more than I’ve done in the last few years. This may surprise people—it certainly surprised me—but I’ve realized there’s still some things I’d like to say.”Maybe stupidly sappy things about green eyes leading him to heaven.“So I think I may have another album in me after all.”
Someone in the audience screams, “Yes!” and Trevor’s pretty sure they’re not supposed to do that, but Miles laughs good-naturedly, so he laughs too. Guess some of the audience really are fans.
The rest of the interview goes more smoothly, and by the time he’s meeting Skyler back in the greenroom, getting wrapped up in a hug so fierce Skyler literally lifts him off his feet for a second, Trevor thinks that Skyler (and fine, even Courtney) was right about this being a good thing for him.
He’s spent too long hiding. And he’ll probably never have the same level of success he had with Boys Will Be Boys. He won’t ever reach Skyler’s level of fame. But that’s okay. That doesn’t mean he shouldn’t continue making music if he still loves it.
Doing this means inviting the intrusive media back into his life, but that might be worth it for the chance to do more of what he loves. It’s worth it if it makes the fans happy, and more importantly, if it makes him happy too.
Maybe it’s possible to get back to the place where putting his heart out there through his music feels cathartic, rather than terrifying.
Chapter Thirty
Before
SKYLER
Hurrying off toward hisdressing room after a great show, Skyler couldn’t wait to change out of his tight, sweaty clothes. But the sound of clacking heels rapidly growing closer behind him caught his attention. And as he turned to look over his shoulder, Maggie grabbed his arm harshly, spinning him around to face her.
“What in the hell did you think you were doing tonight?”
The shrill tone of her voice ringing through the practically empty corridor made him shrink back against the wall. She only barely released her grip of him before he had to yank his arm away. Her gray blazer was buttoned incorrectly, pieces of her hair had fallen out of her clip, and Skyler was so surprised at seeing her looking anything less than perfectly put together that it took him a second to figure out what she was yelling about.
It had to be his small lyric adjustment tonight. But geez, it was one word. Changing thegirlin “My girl’s always been everything I need”toguy. The audience had probably barely picked up on it. He didn’t even look at Trevor when he sang it. Which took some self-control, might he add, and he should get credit for that.
