Ange, can we talk? I miss you xx
Chapter Nine
Either all children are starting to look the same or I’m getting return customers at the grotto hoping to bag some extra Christmas gifts. There’s a tiny girl with red curly hair who just sits and stares at me, saying nothing at all. A boy who claims to be nine, but has more facial hair than Matt, who asks for anime figures, and a pair of twins who seem more captivated by Izzy than me. I also recognise the European nannies, making an almost daily trip to the grotto to keep their kids happy while they meet up and have coffee.
However, one kid in particular has visited at least three times, each time asking for an upgrade to his last request. First was an Xbox One, then he added in a games pack. Today he’s back with new demands.
‘Daniel, isn’t it?’
‘I want an Xbox One with Lego Star Wars.’
‘OK, well, I think the elves have already—’
‘And a new headset. A good one.’
‘Gotcha. Anything else? A Tesla? Trip to Mars? The Hope Diamond?’
‘My selection box.’
I look to his mum to see if she has anything to add but she’s too busy on her phone to care. I retrieve a gift from the sack and hand it to him, telling him to be a good boy or Izzy the head elf will pay him a visit. The look of alarm on his face tells me this might be his last trip to the grotto.
I see Sarah arrive for her shift at lunchtime, waving to me as she hurries past. She works so close to the grotto, but I wonder if I’d ever have met her had Alfie not decided to come and find me. Probably not.
Geraldine is still appearing from nowhere and surprising the shit out of me whenever possible. I swear, if I see her head emerge round something one more time, I will lose my mind.
‘Quick word, Nick. I’ve had complaints thatsomeonehas been using an aerosol deodorant in the staffroom, despite the signs clearly stating that it is prohibited due to setting off our smoke alarms. Know anything about this?’
‘Um, no. Maybe the female staff—’
‘Lynx. Africa.’
‘Sorry?’
‘The aerosol was Lynx Africa. After investigation it was found in the bin. We can therefore rule out any female members of staff.’
I desperately want to ask her if she sealed off the room and dusted for fingerprints, but I also want to keep my job.
‘Lynx Africa? Um, I think you’re looking for a far younger culprit,’ I reply. ‘Maybe try the food court staff?’
As she leans in a little, I notice her nostrils quickly flare in and out. She’s sniffing me. She’s actually sniffing me!
‘Wow, it’s not me, Geraldine. I use a roll-on.’
‘Good to know,’ she says, still suspiciously eyeing me up. ‘Not accusing. . . only asking. Anyway, my daughter Carrie is coming here after school. I can’t leave her alone in my office, so she’ll be helping you out for an hour while I’m in a meeting.’
‘Helping with what?’
‘Around four. . . as you were.’
She skulks off and I just sit there, wondering if my day can get any more surreal. I had no idea Geraldine even had a daughter, never mind one named after a horror movie. What the hell is she going to do with me for an hour?
‘I’m not wearing a bloody hat. I’ll just sit on that bench over there, on my phone or something. This is such bullshit.’
Carrie is a fifteen-year-old nightmare. A moody, Geraldine-resembling, grumpy-faced nightmare. At fifteen, logic dictates that she probably could have moseyed around the mall for an hour on her own, but I’m starting to appreciate why her mum wants an eye kept on her.
‘Your mum says otherwise, I’m afraid,’ I respond. ‘And she’s my boss, so take a hat and just make sure no one steals the stuffed toys or something.’
‘Why can’t she do it?’ Carrie asks, pointing to Izzy. ‘She’s just standing around anyway.’
