‘Um. . . well, you see—’
‘ALFIE! Oh, thank God you’re here, I’ve been looking everywhere!’
I turn to see a woman racing towards us, wearing one of the bright blue aprons from the café opposite the grotto.
No, thank God you’re here, I think to myself,I was totally out of my depth there.
‘That’s my mum,’ Alfie whispers, waving to her.
She sweeps up Alfie and kisses him repeatedly on the cheek.
‘I nearly had a heart attack!’ she tells him. ‘You cannot just run off like that! I was going to call the police. . . and the Avengers. . . and Spiderman. . .’
‘Spiderman is in the Avengers,’ Alfie replies, giggling. ‘Sorry, Mum, I just had to see Santa.’
As Alfie’s mum looks at me apologetically, I suddenly feel my chest tighten and a little tingle shoots all the way down my spine. Oh God, she’s lovely. I see where Alfie gets his big eyes from. They’re like two dark pools of. . .Jesus, this isn’t appropriate, Nick, you idiot, she’s a grieving widow. Get a hold of yourself, man.
‘I’m so sorry,’ she blurts out. ‘One minute he was with me, the next—’
‘It’s fine!’ I reply, now more aware than ever of how stupid my Santa voice sounds. I clear my throat. ‘Very nice boy.’
Fucking hell, now I sound Russian.
She smiles and ruffles Alfie’s mop of brown hair as I look anywhere that isn’t directly at her. Damn, she smells good.
‘We’re going to miss the bus; let’s go, Alfie. Say bye to Santa.’ She takes Alfie by the hand and begins to lead him towards the exit.
‘But Santa didn’t say he’d get me what I want for Christmas!’ he exclaims, looking back at me. ‘He needs to say it!’
Oh God, what do I do? People are staring!
‘Santa, PLEASE!’
‘OK, OK, you got it!’ I reply, even throwing in a thumbs up for good measure. His little face lights up and he returns the gesture. Seconds later Alfie and his mum are gone.
‘Imbecile!’ I hear Izzy snarl at me. ‘You just lie to him and now you ruin Christmas for the child.’
‘What was I supposed to do? Tell him no? You saw how cute and desperate he was.’
‘Well, now he will hate Santa.’
‘Well, you hate Santa too, so maybe you can form a club together?’
She rolls her eyes and flounces off with the credit card machine while I make my way back to the staffroom, feeling like shit. Have I just ruined that kid’s Christmas? Eager to get the hell out of there, I grab my clothes from the locker, shoving them into my backpack, and start walking home – belly, beard and all. I need a drink.
Twenty minutes later, I arrive home to see Angela standing outside my building.
‘Hey, sweetie! You’re early!’
I pull the door and hold it open for her. Angela looks at me bewildered until it finally clicks. She steps tentatively towards me.
‘Nick? Is that you?’
‘Yup!’ I laugh as she roughly unhooks my beard from my ears. ‘Careful with that, my boss will make me replace it if I damage it.’
‘Your boss? You got a job?’
‘Yes. . . this is my new job! What do you think?’
