‘One hour to go and then back to my beer,’ he proclaims. ‘You’re welcome to join me.’
‘I’m too tired,’ I reply. ‘Maybe another night.’
‘You’re not still weird about having a drink with me, are you? I really am disgustingly harmless.’
‘No, I actually am tired!’ I insist cheerfully. The truth is, I fully intend to have a large glass of wine, but I want to do it alone in the ugliest, comfiest clothes I own. I stand up and stroll back inside the house, stopping first at the bathroom. If she’s going to play the meditation water sounds again, I need to be prepared.
Miranda is already sitting cross-legged in the meditation room as she welcomes us in for the second time today. I grab a large blue cushion and throw it down on top of the yoga mat. The rest of Group Two are also looking weary, especially Russell whose fedora is now long gone, revealing an impressive bald spot. Meg, however, looks as fresh as she did this morning. I’d ask what her secret is, but I have the feeling the answer is ‘being born in 1996’.
Miranda waits patiently for us all to settle, reminding Will again that lying down during meditation is discouraged. I get the feeling she’s going to have to remind him twice daily as he’s determined.
‘Our evening meditation will be slightly different. The process will begin as we practised earlier, but we’re also going to add in some relationship affirmations. You’ve already briefly worked on self-affirmation during your cosmic ordering session but now we’re going to focus on love and relationships specifically. Just listen to my voice and repeat the words either out loud or in your head, whichever you feel more comfortable with. Let’s begin.’
I close my eyes as the water sounds start to trickle from the speakers and begin breathing to her count, waiting for the mention of the mysterious lavender light that is going to penetrate my head at any second. Once again, my mind is wandering and as much as I try to focus, all I can think of is Will’s look of dismay at having his hand held and how I’m going to get the lid off my hot tub.
‘Breathing deeply… allowing in love and breathing out the stress of the day.’
I am going to starfish my bed.
‘Feeling calmer… going deeper.’
She held his hand, ha!
‘I am unique… I am loveable… I am ready to feel and experience love to its fullest.’
I’m what now? OK. This is new.
‘I am a loving person… I am ready for love… My past is not important, the right person for me is out there… Breathe deeply…’
I hear everyonewhooshin unison.
‘I think positively about love… I am surrounded by people I love.’
I smile as I think of Charlie and my heart swells.
‘I deserve love… I love the feeling of being in love.’
Flashbacks of meeting Charlie’s dad appear in my mind. I knew from our second date that I loved him, and it was the best feeling in the world. I felt like anything was possible.
‘The person I’m looking for is looking for me too… I love deeply and with passion.’
Damn right I do!Shit, did I just say that out loud?
‘The universe is creating circumstances and events to ensure I find love.’
I can hear people gently repeating the affirmations, so softly it’s almost like a collective whisper, and as I listen, for the first time, my mind becomes clear and my body light. Everything feels calm and relaxed. It’s just me and my—
‘And as I count back from five, you will awaken feeling alert and refreshed. Five… four… three… two… one… eyes open!’
Why did she finish so abruptly? My eyes open and dart around the room, to see everyone rising to their feet.
‘Be well, everyone, and enjoy your evening. I’ll see you in the morning.’
‘That was odd,’ I say to Will who yawns as he stands up.
‘What was?’
‘She was all “reeellaaxxx” and “you’re a love magnet” and then suddenly ends it? Seemed much longer this morning, no?’
