She looks at me like I’m full of shit. Both her and Brad have this look down to an art form.
She looks at Will, who’s twirling Meg around. ‘The briefest of moments,’ she muses, watching him dance. ‘I liked that. That’s really all life is – a collection of brief moments… but some moments last a lifetime.’
She shimmies her way through the dancefloor like an enlightened John Travolta and I decide that the best way to deal with the whole Will situation is to get drunk.
There’s no champagne left at table two, so I steal a bottle from table six, grab my wrap and head outside from some fresh air. Thankfully the smokers are going back in as I go out, so it’s just me, my bottle and my bare feet. I perch on a bollard and take a mouthful of Moet.
I’m feeling confused. I came here to escape Faith and Victoria telling me what I should do with my love life, only for them to be replaced with Anna and Brad.
In another life, I’d be seizing the bloody moment and turning it into a future, but that isn’t reality. I could pull love affirmations out of my arse and manifest my ideal partner down to the dimples on his cheeks, but that won’t make Will feel any less for his wife. It doesn’t matter that Will’s wifehasmoved on from him becausehestill hasn’t moved on from her. I cannot give my heart to someone who’s given his to someone else. All I can do is be happy right now.
I’m making good progress on my Moet when Will appears, looking puzzled.
‘I wondered where you’d gone,’ he says. ‘I thought I was going to have to ambush the ladies’ toilets.’
‘I’m a secret champagne drinker,’ I respond. ‘Got any cigs?’
‘Do you smoke?’
‘No. But I thought it might be fun to start.’
‘I think you’re drunk,’ he says, perching beside me. ‘Give me that.’
He takes a huge guzzle and passes it back. Everything he does is sexy now. I’m doomed.
‘Want to ditch everyone and go hot-tubbing?’ he asks, wiping his lips with the back of his hand. ‘We could steal another bottle?’
‘Hell, yes,’ I reply. ‘I’ll grab my shoes, you grab the booze.’
The champagne heist goes as planned, with Will snatching two bottles plus some petite savoury pastries which had been placed on the tables while we were out. We giggle and stumble all the way back to my cabin, eager to get out of the cold and into the hot tub.
‘I’ll get the cover, you get the glasses,’ Will orders, as I kick my half-buckled sandals off again. I oblige, eating an asparagus pastry as I go. I hate asparagus but I’m too drunk to care; food is food. Next, I scoot off to the bedroom to remove my tights and tummy-control shorts, revealing wobbly belly under dress but I still don’t care. Grabbing the bathrobes from the wardrobe, I hear Will yell:
‘DO NOT TAKE OFF THAT DRESS YET.’
Seconds later he appears behind me. ‘I have been wanting to do this all night.’
I feel him slide the zip down slowly then gently pull the straps of my dress on to my arms. It slips down and falls around my feet. He unhooks my bra then kisses my neck as he moves his hands around to my breasts.
‘We’re not making it to the hot tub, are we?’ I ask, as his hands move lower. He pushes me onto the bed and begins to undress, while I watch.
I guess the answer is no.
CHAPTER30
BOOTCAMP: DAY 6
‘Good morning, everyone, we’re so pleased to welcome you to your Farewell Brunch! I hope you’re all hungry!’
Anna looks like she’s had twenty hours’ uninterrupted sleep, unlike the rest of us who look like we’ve all slept inside a tornado. Clothes and hair askew, we shuffle towards the tables, some people looking for their name cards but most just grabbing whatever seat is closest before they throw up.
‘Thank goodness we’re not actually leaving until tomorrow morning,’ Patricia groans, resting her head in her hands. ‘There’s no way I can drive. Or eat. Why am I even awake at eleven am?’
Russell and Kenneth grunt in agreement while Meg rubs her back supportively, but her teetotal, vegan face is judging Patricia hard. I’m secretly a little envious; to never have a hangover again might actually be worth never drinking again… but then I remember how fun it is to be drunk and the envy passes.
‘Please, everyone, help yourselves,’ Anna announces. ‘Pastries, juice and cold food on the left, hot breakfast items on the right. We’ll be bringing round tea and coffee shortly.’
Will looks surprisingly chipper, considering we didn’t fall asleep until after three this morning. He’s made me promise to have dinner with him this evening. A last supper if you will, before we leave tomorrow. Even though I know it’s our last full day together, it doesn’t feel real yet. None of this does. It feels like a very lovely dream, one which I know I’ll be gutted to awaken from. He sits next to me, chatting away to everyone while periodically squeezing my knee under the table to let me know that his mind is very much on me.
