Alex
I laugh as I get dressed to go downstairs. Hilarious and terrifying is accurate.
I grab a quick breakfast with Ellis before we disembark for the beach. I’m looking forward to a lazy day and a final futile attempt to get a suntan. He’s already been to Palamós, so I’ve left him in charge of the itinerary instead of going with something organised by the ship.
‘I just want to be clear that I have no problem with you taking the lead today,’ I say, taking an extra croissant and fruit pot for the beach. ‘You know the best places, it makes sense.’
I notice Ellis also stocking up for the beach. Three apples, a muffin and a yoghurt pot. ‘I get the feeling there’s a but coming,’ he replies, smiling.
‘ButI’m begging you, no mountain climbing or deep-sea diving into a smack of jellyfish. I hear that pisses them off.’
‘God, no jellyfish,’ he assures me. ‘They’re spiteful. But you’ve got your swimsuit, right?’ he asks. ‘And beach shoes? The beach here can be pebbly in parts.’
‘Check and check,’ I reply, pointing to the foam-soled shoes on my feet. My swimming costume is under my sundress but I’m not flashing that for verification. ‘But I’m confused. I seem to remember someone saying that lying around on a beach is boring. . .’
‘Just because we’re at the beach doesn’t mean we’re going to be lying around.’
It’s a pleasant walk from the port to the beach. Not too busy, but lively enough to get into the holiday spirit. Between the smell of the sea air and the morning sun kissing the back of my neck, I feel the most relaxed I’ve felt since coming on this cruise.
‘So how was your date?’ he asks casually, as we stroll towards the marina. ‘All go well?’
‘You were right about the older woman stuff,’ I reply. ‘He absolutely wanted me.’
‘Told you.’
‘Only problem was, so did his friends.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘What do you think I mean?’
He snorts. ‘You’re kidding?’
‘Nope,’ I reply, grinning. ‘He wore a full-on pineapple shirt. I didn’t even pay attention at first. It was hilarious. I feel bad for laughing but it was so unexpected.’
‘But did you—’
‘Not a chance. One of the guys looked like Chevy Chase.’
When we arrive, I see the booking centre and an abundance of boats. Everything from trawlers to yachts and speed boats. I start to get excited. A boat ride would be a fantastic way to end to the cruise. Something calm. Something with a breeze. No more tired legs, no more brain power required. Maybe some wine. Ooh, I wonder if they’ll provide lunch. The sea air always makes me peckish.
As I admire the view Ellis disappears inside the booking centre, leaving me safe in the knowledge that painful fish stings aren’t on the agenda. As fun as it’s been to visit Spain and Italy, sightseeing is more exhausting that I’d anticipated. A few minutes later, Ellis returns.
‘You need to sign this. It’s just a contract to say you won’t sue them if you fall off the boat or something.’
I take the form.Waiver and Release.The rest is in Spanish.
I hear people screeching as they zip around on jet skis with dogs barking at them from the beach. I scribble my signature.
‘Good to go?’ he asks, handing the forms to a member of staff and saying something in Spanish.
‘I didn’t know you spoke Spanish,’ I say.
‘You never asked. Come on, we’re just down here.’
I can’t say I’m not a little disappointed. It’s a red speed boat with two people already on board. I’m not sure what I was expecting but it wasn’t this. I’m no high-maintenance princess but I thought it might be something a little more refined. Like that white boat in the distance with the sail and the tanned man standing on deck in his shorts. Still, the seats are comfortable, and we have elaborate life jackets in case anyone gets violently launched out of the boat. There was a video on YouTube where an entire group of attractive people in swimsuits are propelled into the sea. Not funny for them, but hilarious to watch. I would very much like not to end up on YouTube.
‘I’m Kelly. This is my husband, Steven.’
