“No,” my sister said, swiping before I could respond.
“But he was cute and into D&D.”
“You need someone grown,” she said. “Someone you don’t have to teach. You taught Graham for years. Taught him how to do laundry, taught him how to fucking brush his teeth properly.” Lithie made a face. It was true. When I met Graham, he didn’t know to brush his teeth twice a day.
She continued. “There is nothing less sexy than a man that needs to be taught.”
So we stayed like that, swiping and swiping, with occasional breaks to pop corn or grab a drink.
“Wait!” Lithie yelled. “Him.”
My gut did a somersault at the profile of a man named “C.” I felt an immediate tug, like something in my chest came loose at the sight of his sharp jaw and intense blue eyes. Some kind of tattoo snaked out of the collar of his shirt, and I was dying to know how many he had.
Oh mygod.
I knew him.
“I met him,” I said. “A week ago. He…”Almost beat someone up for running into me.“He bought me tea.”
“He looks intense,” Olly said, approvingly. “Not in aputs the lotion on the skinway, but in like a…” She put her hand to her plush lips, uncertain.
“In like ayou won’t know how to walk the next dayway?” Eames asked. Olly placed her finger to her nose—exactly.
“What the fuck, he already messaged you.” Lithie shot me an accusing look. “You’ve made us sift through everyEuphoriareject on the planet whenthiswas in your inbox?” She turnedher attention to his message, reading aloud, “Not sure how a three-way with two galaxies works,but I’d like to learn.You’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”
My breath caught. I swallowed something sharp. He hadn’t called me a cosmetologist or asked if my lips were pouty from dick sucking.
Heknewwhat that picture was.
Or he’d looked up the image and studied. Which was infinitely hotter.
“Are you kidding me?” Lithie said. “He even responded to your nerd bait.”
“He called you hot too,” Olly said.
“He called the Bullet Cluster hot,” I clarified. “Which, it is. It’s like the hottest known cluster.” Eames and Olly released a groan in unison.
Lithie exhaled and rubbed between her brow in afucking save meway. “You’re responding.” Before I could say anything, Lithie read her response aloud slow and staccato, enunciating each word as she typed it. “What are you doing this week and do you want one of those things to be me?”
“Oh my god!” I lunged for her. “You can’t say that!”
“Sent!” She squealed as I tackled her off the mushroom-shaped stool.
He wouldn’t respond. He’d probably sent that by accident.
“He’s already typing!” Lithie said, her voice squished and breathless with my weight.
“Damn, already?” Eames said. “He’s down bad.”
Lithie squirmed out from under me and I followed her, toppling us both over the couch as she read the newest text aloud.
“Are you free tomorrow?” Lithie squealed, her voice reaching a pitch only a dog could hear.
“No!” I said. “I can’t meet him.”
“Why?” Lithie deadpanned. “Is your vagina still toppling democracies and installing puppet nations? Or has Obama-era hope finally entered the labia?”
Before meeting Void, I’d gotten my first wax in two years, which my waxer was kind enough to inform me was why it hurt so bad.
