One night, late, after Selene has tucked them in and read a story, I sneak into their room to kiss them goodnight. Arron is still awake.
“Daddy, why are you and Mommy fighting?” he asks, sounding worried.
“We’re not fighting,” I say, gently touching his cheek.
“Yes, you are. It’s scary, even though you don’t say anything.”
I sigh, hating that he can pick up on the tension so easily. What did I expect? He’s not blind. I think a deaf, dumb, and mute person would pick up on the tension between Selene and me.
“Do we have to move out?” Arron asks, his little voice breaking as he fights tears.
“Oh, absolutely not. Never. No kiddo, no.” I scoop him into my arms and hold him against my chest. “Your mommy and I are just working some things out. I promise you it’s not so bad. It just seems bad, but we will figure it all out. You aren’t moving out. Never. This is your home, and it always will be.”
He looks up at me, his eyes wide with relief. “Promise?” he asks.
I nod, “Promise. Pirates code promise,” I say.
“Pirates are not very good at keeping promises,” he grins.
“Alright. How about this. If I break this promise, I will have to de-shell one hundred prawns all by myself,” I say, raising my brows in seriousness.
His eyes go wide. “One million,” he says, negotiating hard.
“Alright. Deal. And you know I never want to do that, right? So, I will never break the promise,” I say sternly.
The deal seems to please him and satisfy his worries. He snuggles back against the pillow, slipping his hand underneath it to grab something.
“What have you got under there?” I ask.
He pulls his hand out to show me a golden coin. “It was the best day ever,” he smiles, playing with the coin that is almost the size of his hand. “I never had a day like that before.”
My heart breaks for him. Maybe I shouldn’t have rushed them back home. But what choice did I have? Safety over anything else.
“We’ll go back to the beach soon, little one. You’ll have so many best days you won’t know what to do with all of them.”
“Ok,” he says through a yawn as his eyes drift closed.
I stand up, leaving them to sleep, and make my way to my own bedroom.
This is the most awkward part of the whole arrangement.
Selene and I are still sharing a bed. We briefly discussed how it would confuse and upset the twins if she suddenly moved back into her room, so she’s still in mine. She’s still next to me at night, her warmth seeping across the sheets and tainting me. Her scent on my pillows and her body curved against mine when she absentmindedly drifts closer to me in her sleep.
Fuck.
It’ssofucking hard because thetrusthas faltered,notthe attraction.
Selene looks up at me when I walk in. “Um, I’m finished in the bathroom if you want to shower,” she says polite and clipped.
“Thank you,” I reply, just as clipped.
I take a step towards the bathroom as she steps forward, and we almost bump into each other. For a moment, we do a weird little dance around each other, trying to step around each other.
I stop, lift my hands in defense. “You go. I’ll wait,” I huff.
She licks her lips nervously and steps around me. She keeps her back to me, sitting on the edge of the bed, and she gracefully runs cream into her legs.
Fuck. So beautiful. So stunningly beautiful.
