And you won’t find holes here,
Because they give Mischa the blues.
I laughed so hard. Brian knew me well, even back then. As soon as I spot a hole on the heel of one of his socks, I make him throw them out because I can’t stand it. Holes in socks make me so tense. It’s one of my many silly quirks.
Everyone followed as I quickly put on my winter boots and jacket and scurried outside, over to Brian’s room, up in the garage apartment. I ran to his dresser. I slid the top drawer open and it pained me to see such a mess. I had the sudden intense desire to organize his socks. I made a mental note to ask if I could later. I was sure he wouldn’t have a problem with it. I eagerly dug through the mess of socks, searching for that elusive note. I wondered how long this little scavenger hunt would go on for. Were we going to do this all day? I was having fun either way.
When I finally spotted the tiny scroll at the bottom of the drawer, I was ecstatic. I was giddy as I carefully unfolded it.
Look in the box on top of the dresser. xo
I reached for the box; a large beautiful carved design, a gift from Brian’s godmother. As soon as I flipped the lid open, my breath hitched. There was a pretty Russian stacking doll inside.
Brian shot me a sweet smile.
I was smiling as I twisted open all the dolls until the smallest one revealed exactly what I expected — a pretty silver ring with a small diamond. It was absolutely beautiful… perfect.
Brian got down on one knee. “Will you marry me, Mischa.”
For the longest time, I was completely speechless, almost brought to tears.
Finally, I came to my senses and fell to my knees too. “Yes!”
He scooped me up in his arms and held me tightly, as if he never wanted to let me go.
When we finally reluctantly tore apart, he took my hand and carefully slid the ring on my finger. “It’s always been you, Mischa.”
Those were the words he said to me when he slipped the diamond on my finger. He smiled at me and committed to spending the rest of his life with me and only me. And all the while, another woman was holding his child in her arms.
Part IV
Temptation
32
Tonight, the girls and I are doing something a little different — movie night. Tonight’s selection:Sex and the City. We all loved the show and have all seen the movie before, but it’s the kind of flick you can watch many times. It’s exactly what I need to get my mind off things — a little frivolity.
Abigail came up with the idea of putting on our best heels and drinking Cosmos in honor of Carrie Bradshaw and her cohorts. We always talk about which one we’re most like. I’m definitely like Miranda. Gretchen is so Charlotte. Abigail and Claudia are both Carries. None of us are quite like the sex-crazed Samantha.
Renee would fit right in on the set ofSex and the City. She’s so glamorous and stylish, and her long legs would look fabulous in all those designer heels. She’s the kind of woman who could pull off all those outlandish styles Carrie wears.
Claudia pops some popcorn in the microwave while Abigail takes care of the Cosmos. Gretchen and I are busy arranging a tray of treats into the shape of a heart; bite-sized chocolate bars, gummy bears and Mentos candies.
When we’re done, Abigail hands us Cosmos. I take a sip and stare down at my shoes. I’ve chosen my favorite pair; red Stuart Weitzman peep toe platforms, sexy but very comfortable. Gretchen is wearing adorable retro-inspired grey silk pumps. Abigail is wearing lovely plum Nine West colored pointy pumps with a criss-cross strap, and Claudia is in classic black stilettos.
I can’t stop thinking about Joel and Renee. Has she kept this secret from him all these years, like Brian has? I itch to tell him, but it’s really not my place. I could never do this to him. Just look at me — I’m a complete disaster. I was faring so much better when I was blissfully clueless. And could it possibly affect his relationship with Ava? I could never do that to them.
Claudia is hogging the bowl of popcorn and Gretchen is stuffing her face with candy. We’re all transfixed by the images on the screen; Carrie is trying on the most beautiful wedding gowns we’ve ever seen.
“I just love the Vera Wang,” Gretchen says.
“Too much,” Claudia chimes in. “I prefer the Christian Lacroix.”
“My favorite is the Oscar de la Renta,” Abigail says. “Not too crazy about the Vivienne Westwood. The boobs are too pointy.”
Laughs all around. I feign a chuckle, attempting to revel in the moment, but all I can do is think about Joel. I steal the bowl of popcorn from Claudia. “I kind of like the Vera Wang too,” I chime in, putting my two cents in.
He doesn’t need to know, I tell myself. He doesn’t deserve the heartbreak. He’s one of the sweetest people I’ve ever known. I honestly don’t know what he sees in Renee — she’s not good enough for him.
