My heart sprints into overdrive — the proximity makes me nervous. “Brian says I meddle too much, that I should mind my own business. He thinks I’m crazy.”
He inches even closer, so close I inhale his familiar scent. “But aren’t you though?” he teases.
I smile. “You know me too well.”
“I do.”
The energy between us has shifted, has entered foreign territory. I feel warm all over, lightheaded. I also feel so wretched and so tired. I just want to be taken away. I want Joel to take me away. Far away, if only for just a little while.
But we can’t do this. I can’t do this to Brian.
Yet I can’t back away. I’m pressed against the counter and he’s got me caged in. And more importantly, I don’t want to get away. I feel protected, cared for. My heart is throbbing furiously, my sex too. He’s so beautiful… I want to reach out and taste him.
“What was your fight about?” I ask.
“You.”
His eyes are dark as they fix mine. He bends down and our mouths meet. His kiss is tentative at first, measured — he’s testing the waters. When I respond eagerly, when my tongue explores his mouth, tastes him properly, his kiss intensifies. When I tangle my hands in his hair, his own slide down my neck, over my breasts, all the way down and around my ass. When a soft whimper escapes me, he presses against me harder. When I moan at the feel of his hard-on on my belly, he slides his large hands under my thighs and hikes me up on the counter. When I run my eager mouth against the stubble of his chin, his own greedy hand slides between my legs.
I’ve gone too far to go back. I rub myself against his hand, completely out of control, desperately craving that release. I know he can take me to a place where I can forget everything, where my problems don’t exist. A place where there’s just him and I.
He slides his long lean frame down mine and hikes up my blouse. He runs his tongue up my stomach until he reaches my chest, slides a finger under the delicate lace of my bra and releases my breast. I throw my head back when he takes my breast in his hot mouth. I know this is so wrong, yet I can’t stop him. I haven’t felt this wanted, this alive, in a long time. When he pulls away, I ache.
He travels slowly down my body, pries my legs open and buries his head between my thighs. I rake my hands through his hair as he presses his warm mouth on my pussy, as he bites at the fabric of my leggings, as I fuck his face. He brings me to climax in no time, despite the fact that my panties and leggings are still on. When I reach my release, loud desperate guttural moans escape my throat and echo off the walls of the large empty space.
When I finally settle down, he ventures back up and we kiss softly. I slide my hand down his torso and reach for him, but he grabs a hold of my wrist. I study him curiously — his brows are knitted together, a strained grimace traces his lips. He’s restless, tense. “I can’t let you do that. You don’t belong to me, Mischa. It wouldn’t be right.”
“But I want to…” I say quietly. I want to give him the same pleasure he’s just given me. I want to help him forget all his troubles.
“I need to take you home,” he says. “I can’t do this to Renee.”
He’s too good for his own good. He knows about Renee and Grant, yet he still won’t cheat on her. I’m not surprised at all by this turn of events. “Aren’t you rock-hard right now?” I tease.
“Actually, I’m kind of in pain,” he jokes. “Don’t worry about me… I’ll take care of myself as soon as I get you home.”
“I thought you wanted to talk,” I say, confused.
“If we stay here one second longer, we might do something we’ll both regret forever.”
My gaze pulls from his. His words sting.
He grabs my chin, and pulls my face to his. “You’re amazing, Mischa. And if I were to step out on Renee, there’s no one else I would choose. I shouldn’t have kissed you. I shouldn’t have started this. We’re both married, and I couldn’t live with myself…”
“I understand.” I really do.
We’re driving backto my place, and an old Peter Gabriel song is playing on the radio. “Why were you fighting about me?” I ask.
“Renee doesn’t want me to see you anymore.”
“Oh, I see.” Interesting. She gets to hang out with Grant all day, but he doesn’t get to hang out with me. It doesn’t seem fair. But of course, I don’t say anything. It’s none of my business.
The rest of the drive is quiet. I’m not sure how I feel. I’m more confused than ever. I care a lot for Joel, but I still love my husband. But that kiss… I’ll never forget that kiss.
When we get there, he leans over and gives me a sweet peck on the cheek. “Good night, Mischa.”
“Good night, Joel.”
As I step out, my eyes well up. I don’t know why I’m crying. Possibly because I know there could never be anything between us. As perfect as we could be together, we just aren't meant for each other.
