“Who broke it off?” I ask. I know I’m being super nosy, but I can’t help it.
“She did initially. I couldn’t let go… A lot happened, and eventually, I did. I made a conscious decision to let her go.”
The oven timer pings, and I silently curse it. How dare it interrupt our conversation. I reluctantly walk over and don my oven mitts. Thankfully, I need to let the lasagna cool for ten minutes.
“Sorry… go on.”
He smiles. “Are you sure you want to know?”
“I do.”
“Well, I just finally decided to let her go. With a lot of therapy, physio and psychological—”
“Why did you need physio?”
“Oh, I was in a serious car accident.”
“Oh no. I’m so sorry.”
“Cheez,” Ethan squeals. “Cheez.” He wants more cheese.
“No, no more cheese, baby,” I tell him. “You don’t want bad poops.”
Weston smiles.
“So the accident? Did it play a part in you deciding to let go?”
“It did.”
An uncomfortable silence fills the kitchen, and I’m dying to know more. As hard as it is, I respect his privacy and I don’t utter another word.
“She’d just ended it between us, and told me it was over. I was driving recklessly. It wasn’t like me at all. I was consumed with rage. God, I could have hurt someone…”
I remain silent. I study Ethan who is now amusing himself by breaking his crackers into the tiniest pieces.
“I didn’t consciously intend to spin myself off into the ditch. I just had no fear. A small of part of me wanted to die. I wasn’t even thinking…”
“Was it a suicide attempt?” I finally ask.
He is quiet for the longest time, lost in another place, another life. I slowly inch closer, wanting to comfort him. Could he really have tried to kill himself? I can’t imagine. Only the most intense love could drive someone to do that. Was what he shared with Mirella that intense? Did he love her that passionately?
I’m dying to know.
