My last forkful of cake hovered over the plate as I glanced around at the bags and boxes of baby equipment surrounding us, and then I smiled at her.
“Sounds like we have the perfect summer ahead,” I said, and she returned my smile, her hand drifting down to her gently rounded abdomen. But that last mouthful of cake turned to glue on my tongue. I forced it down with the dregs of my tea, determined to be optimistic about the next few months: Ruth’s baby would have a great father in Dominic; Dominic might become less awkward with me; Alex might come back to Summerbourne...
I placed the cup carefully down on the saucer and leanedforward to admire a tiny cardigan that Ruth had pulled from one of the carrier bags. Alex might come back to Summerbourne.
“Are you okay?” Ruth asked.
“Yeah, fine,” I said. “Worn out from all that shopping!”
She laughed, and turned to catch the attention of a staff member, asking him to carry our purchases out to the car for us. And all the while my insides squirmed, as if a sea serpent was rearranging its coils inside me.
21
Seraphine
EDWIN AND Iunpack the grocery bags together on Saturday morning. As ever, the effect the fresh ingredients have on him is powerful: he smiles as he rubs his thumbs over the onions, flexes the celery, sniffs at the Parmesan, and inspects the prawns. He’s in his element, relaxed and happy; at moments like this, he reminds me so much of Dad.
Danny is still in bed. I set out cutlery and glasses on the old red tablecloth in the dining room, fussing with napkins, irritated by my inability to be calm like my brothers. I’m wearing a new cotton dress, but I can’t find my sandals that go with it, and when the doorbell rings, I answer it barefoot, distracted.
Joel stands there with a bunch of hydrangeas.
“From Michael’s garden,” he says. “For the table.”
“Oh.”
“Everything okay?”
I realize I haven’t moved. When I reach for the flowers, ourfingers brush against each other, and I come close to blurting out a jumble of questions:Did you really not know Michael has a key for Summerbourne? Why didn’t you hit Ralph back at Edwin’s party after I kissed you? Did you know Michael’s old weed torch was stolen from Ralph’s van last week? What did you mean when you said we could start over? As friends? As more than friends?
“Edwin’s in there,” I say, indicating the kitchen door, and I escape to the dining room with the hydrangeas. The pink flower heads are full and heavy, droplets of water still clinging to their petals. A wave of nostalgia washes over me: for Summerbourne’s formerly beautiful garden, for the days when Michael ruled over it with cheerful authority, and for a time when Joel and I were friends and life was uncomplicated.
A whole hour before she’s expected, Kiara arrives. I happen to be passing through the hall, still barefoot, and I freeze, watching her through the window as she unfolds herself from the driver’s seat. She wears some kind of silky black sleeveless jumpsuit, and delicate heeled sandals which must surely make driving difficult. She’s tall and slender, and I realize the word I’m really searching for iselegant. I swallow.
Danny has come down the stairs behind me in old shorts and T-shirt, bleary-eyed, and he whistles now as he peers through the window past the visitor.
“Nice wheels.”
Edwin is at the kitchen door, with Joel standing behind him, both watching curiously. When the doorbell rings, Danny gives me a shove in the small of my back.
“Your idea, sis,” he says.
I take a deep breath as I swing the door open.
“Kiara. Hi.” I do my best to smile at her. Her hair is how I remember, with the pink streak to one side, but up close, I amtransfixed by the tiny diamond stud in the side of her nose, and the rows of similar sparkles in her ears. She thrusts a box of Belgian chocolates at me.
“Hi. I’m sorry I’m so early. I allowed extra time, and then the roads were so clear.” She sounds nervous, and I’m not proud of the fact that this helps me relax a little. I turn around as she steps into the hall, ready to make introductions. I glimpse Edwin passing the vegetable knife he was holding to Joel, who places it carefully on the countertop behind him. They move properly into the hall then too.
“This is Danny,” I say, “my twin brother.”
“All right?” Danny says, and Kiara smiles and nods at him.
“And this is Edwin, our older brother,” I say.
Edwin reaches out a hand and shakes hers.
“Pleased to meet you. I remember your father. I liked him a lot,” he says.
Her smile widens. “Hi.”
