Bloody hell.
That thought alone should probably send me into a spiral, but instead it just… stays. Which is almost worse. Because now I actually have to deal with it.
This is something I should tell Varek, right?
The idea makes my stomach flip—not in a bad way, but in that unfamiliar, exposed kind of way that comes with saying things out loud that actually matter.
And then there’s the other problem. Does Varek evenknowwhat that means?
He understands bonds. Fated mates. Instinct. Biology. All the things his world built into him from the start.
But love?
That’s… different. Isn’t it? Or maybe it’s not. Maybe I’m just complicating the hell out of something that doesn’t need it.
“Do you need to use the shitter or something?”
Sonny’s voice cuts straight through my spiralling thoughts. I blink, dragging my focus back to him.
He aims a big grin my way as he gestures vaguely at my face, drawing a circle in the air. “I mean, you’re either constipated, about to bolt for the nearest toilet, or your brain’s doing laps again.”
I roll my eyes, grateful for the interruption. “No, I don’t need the loo.”
Sonny snorts. “There it is.”
“What?”
“Loo.That accent,” he says, pointing at me like he’s just proven a theory. “Comes out when you’re being snipey or distracted.”
My lips twitch despite myself. “Yeah, well. It’s still in there somewhere. Hard to shake completely.”
“Good,” he says. “Adds flavour.”
“Glad I can entertain.”
“You do,” he replies easily, then squints at me again. “So which is it?”
“Which is what?”
“Constipation or existential crisis?”
I hesitate. Then I sigh, scrubbing a hand over my face. I’ve been bonded for a lot longer that Sonny—or at least met my fated mate when Sonny would have still been a teenager. Add in that he’s a fair bit younger than I am, I feel a bit of a clueless dick for even considering sharing this with him. Fuck it. “All right, fine. It’s the second one.”
“Called it,” he mutters, looking entirely too pleased with himself. “Hit me.”
I glance at him sideways, then back out at the open stretch in front of us. “Fated mates,” I say slowly. “That’s… a thing in this world. Well. Kael’s world. Varek’s world. Now our world.”
“Yep.”
“And it’s all instinct, right? Bonding, connection, all that.”
“Also yep.”
I hesitate again, then push through it because, apparently, I’ve decided today is the day I say things I normally wouldn’t.
“So where does love fit into that?”
Sonny goes still. He doesn’t answer straight away, which is probably the most serious I’ve ever seen him. “Huh,” he says eventually, scratching at his jaw. “That’s actually a decent question.”
