Minutes after, she was still shaking. Every time she thought it had passed, another shudder rippled through her. Sweat had gathered in the dip of her clavicle.
Rune climbed up her body and brushed his fingers over her face.
“Was that good for you?” he asked.
She nodded. Her eyes fell to his lips, which were glistening with her juices. Blood rushed to her face, making her burn hot. She wanted to apologize, tell him he shouldn’t have swallowed. It must’ve tasted awful. She would’ve licked his lips to find out for herself, but such as things were, all she could do was let shame scorch her.
“Will you let me do that again? Later…”
She had to look away from his face.
He lay down beside her and gathered her in his arms. They stayed like that for a while, hands roaming over each other, fingers meeting to entangle and disentangle, lips and noses brushing.
“How did you get here?” he asked in a contemplative tone. “Did you travel alone? It’s dangerous out there. The snowstorm… I hope you found shelter.”
She nuzzled his neck. She had so much to tell him. She felt sleepy and content, wrapped up in him.
“Briar brought me here, but you probably know that. You figured it out, that’s why you came. She was good to me. Better than I deserve. I’m afraid I wasn’t good to her at all. More of a burden and a nuisance. She tried to teach me how to use your walking stick to navigate, but I was so stubborn. Her mother is a lovely woman, though she doesn’t speak. She let me stay here and helped me through… a tough moment. I’m not proud of myself, Seraphina. Of the things I’ve done, of what I put Briar through. She should’ve left me behind so many times. She believes I’m good for something, but I keep telling her… like I keep telling you. I’m not.”
She poked him in the chest in a sign of protest.
He didn’t get the message.
“All I am is ruin.”
She pressed her lips to his to shut him up.
“And sorrow,” he whispered between her insistent kisses.
The fire in the hearth shrunk to embers, the house turned cold, and Rune got up to throw more logs in. Seraphina dressed herself and went looking for food. There was plenty of it, as the nuns had made sure Sister Margaret had all she needed, but unfortunately, all she could eat was soup, and even that proved to be messy.
Seraphina wondered if she should go down to the convent. It was unpleasant to accept, but she felt weak and frightened. She’d put on a spectacle earlier, using the apex relic carelessly, and with a sigh and a roll of her eyes, she could admit that she’d sort of gotten what she deserved. She wondered if the sea shanty was still going.
The sun dipped over the horizon, and then it was too late to leave. The gate would be locked for the night, and the stupid bell was broken again. It always broke in winter, and the sisters only deigned to fix it in spring. She and Rune sat by the hearth, playing with each other’s hands. He told her about his and Briar’s journey here, something about diving into a frozen lake and Briar catching a cold because of it, but she didn’t understand why they’d done that, or why Rune felt guilty about it. Her eyes were heavy. She couldn’t pay attention anymore.
Rune carried her to bed, tucked her in, and wrapped himself around her. It was warm – almost unbearably so – the rhythm of his heart was soothing, and as she fell asleep, for once she didn’t think about the nightmares that awaited her. He was there, he would wake her, she’d cling to him, and she’d know she was safe. Because he was real, and the nightmares were not.
It must’ve been hours later, past midnight, when they were roused by loud banging on the door. Rune jumped to his feet, and Seraphina reached for the daggers she’d left on the bedside table.
“Seraphina!” Idris’s voice.
She took Rune’s hand in hers to calm him down. Together, they went to open the door. Idris was standing in the dark, clothes disheveled and cloak torn from where a branch must’ve caught it. She saw the atlas vertebra still on the chain around his neck. He hadn’t given it back, which meant the Mother Superior hadn’t asked for it. Strange.
“The convent is being attacked. They approached in the night, men and women, climbed over the walls. They don’t look like the Harvester’s army. It’s chaos down there. I didn’t know what to do. I’m not a fighter.”
He looked up at Rune, and Seraphina knew. Idris had come for him.
“I know there’s another way,” he said in a lower, tenser voice. “But I don’t think it would be fair to Nine.”
No, it wouldn’t be.
He stepped over the threshold and pulled a bundle out of his pocket.
“I brought these.”
He unfastened it, and Seraphina saw two perfect eyeballs, the irises gold and faintly glowing. Her visceral reaction must’ve shown on her face, because Idris grimaced.
“The boys’ have gone bad. The tissue is damaged.”
