The older woman hesitated, her expression pained. Birdie understood she was asking for a lot. That all of this was irregular and putting Elizabeth at risk, potentially, and she hated to ask that. Wouldn’t if it didn’t feel so, so important.
“I understand,” Elizabeth said.
Birdie nodded, swallowing as best she could through her tightened throat. “I have to get out from under her thumb. But it’s just not that easy.”
“You can always stay with me,” Elizabeth said.
Birdie knew that. Losing her mother had been a terrible blow, and nothing would ever replace her. But where her stepmother had never offered her anything, Elizabeth had stepped in and become such a wonderful, soft, caring force in her life.
“Elizabeth, one way or the other, everything is going to break open. I can’t hide the pregnancy forever. I’ll either be staying with you, living in the shadows like you said that I might because the king doesn’t want to acknowledge the baby publicly or… This is my one hope.”
“I’ll give you everything to take to your house so that you can get ready there. I’ll make sure that you get led into the palace. It won’t be impossible. It’s just more difficult.”
“I know. There was no other way.”
“I know, Birdie.” Elizabeth stepped forward and put her hand on Birdie’s cheek, before tucking her hair behind her ear. “It’s very difficult to try and soar when so many people have tried to clip your wings. But you are very brave.”
“And maybe very foolish,” she said.
Elizabeth smiled, sad and wistful. “Maybe. But love makes fools of all of us. I was in love once.”
“You were?”
She looked down. “Yes. And if there’s one regret I have in my life it’s that I didn’t work harder for that love. It requires bravery to love. To try and demolish the barriers surrounding it. You are doing that. It’s extremely brave. And in the end, worth it. Because to live a life without doubt and regret must be a beautiful thing.”
Birdie’s throat tightened. “I hope so.”
She stashed the gown in her attic room, and worked on the mask in the evenings. A basic, cheap shape that she’d ordered online, and was hand beading to match the vines on her dress.
Once everyone in the house left, she would be able to get herself ready and go to the ball. She would be a little bit late, but it wouldn’t be the end of the world. She would’ve had to be late even if she’d been at the palace. Because she was going to have to finagle her way past anyone checking a guest list no matter where her starting point was.
She was no Cinderella, and there were no enchanted mice and pumpkins to help usher her in, so she had to be clever if she couldn’t be magic.
With her plan firmly in place, she was feeling better about the night. Even though she was sick with nerves. It was getting harder and harder to hide her condition as the weeks ticked by, and she was starting to get worried she was going to have to let the dress out for the ball. When it came to uniforms, it was simple. As easy as making a trade in the laundry facility. New uniforms were always available for staff for free.
A bespoke, valuable gown was another matter. But thank God, the day of the ball arrived, and she could still zip herself into it. She’d never had such cleavage in her life.
Which ordinarily she might be pleased about, because she did look very good in the dress, but she needed the king to recognize her on instinct. And if there was one thing he did know intimately it was her body.
Does he? Or is this all wishful thinking? Is this all foolishness?
Maybe he was only thinking of the queen. Maybe he was only thinking of his own needs.
Maybe he didn’t really want you at all.
She took the gown off, and stuck it in the back of her closet, and then went downstairs to begin helping her sisters get ready.
“I wonder if we can film a dance at the palace,” Alana said, looking at her reflection in the mirror. Her stepsister’s breasts were taped into her dress, her cleavage a truly impressive feat. She hated that it made her feel insecure. That both of her stepsisters were beautiful, in spite of the fact that they were ridiculous.
Natalie had strands of pink curls woven through her hair, and genuinely, it should’ve looked stupid. But she seemed vivacious and pretty, and maybe the king would like that.
No. What a nightmare. She could not deal with a future where Onyx married either of them, and what she knew about him didn’t seem to indicate that he would ever be interested in anyone like them.
Finally, they were ready, and she began to head back to her own room, when her stepmother met her at the center of the stairs. “What is this?”
She was holding the mask that Birdie had spent all that time on in her hands.
“It’s nothing,” she said, her stomach tight.
