She said it so matter-of-factly, but I wasn’t so sure how it would go down. I knew nobody would be actually angry at me for saying no, but making costumes and baking for D&D nights had been my main contributions to the group for so long.
But I knew Amy was right, too. I couldn’t keep doing this. And just over a month and a half wasn’t enough time to make gowns for a fantasy ball. So maybe thiswasthe thing that needed to give.
I tried to picture what I could do with all the energy I’d been throwing into costumes over the last few weeks, and beyond a good long nap, my imagination was only filled with things Amy and I could do together. Maybe it was her near-constant presence, or maybe it was because we hadn’t done anything super couply lately. But I cut myself off from going down that route, like I always did, because it only ever led to one type of imagining. And I saved that for when I was alone, and she was far enough away that I couldn’t get myself into any trouble.
Plus, I knew that realistically there would be plenty to fill that time. Hell, before Amy had started coming around more, the house had gotten so filthy I’d almost been too embarrassed to let her in. And then there was the inevitable truth that Ethel’s mobility and independence would continue to decline…
“I think you’re right,” I said, and she smiled the shit-eating grin I’d learned was reserved for when she was proven correct. “I’ll tell them tonight that they can buy their own outfits, and Atelier Owen is on hiatus.”
“But not for me,” Amy said, and I knew instantly that she was joking. “I still need something fabulous as payment for all my flesh wounds.” She held up her thumb, which was wrapped in a plaster from where she’d stabbed into it enough times with the needle to constitute a proper wound.
“You can fuck right off,” I said, making her laugh, and I relished the sound as it bounced around the bright lounge.
But little did she know, I did have plans for her. Plans that involved breaking my new “no corsets” rule. Plans for a dress so perfect that seeing her in it would almost certainly make my life– amongst other things– much harder, given that she wasn’t actually mine. But I couldn’t get the idea out of my head. Now I only had to figure out how to pull it off without her noticing.
* * *
That Saturday,Anil texted me to say that his class had been cancelled again, so he was free for the evening if I needed him. I didn’t even hesitate before taking him up on it. I was excited to go out with Amy, but I also needed a bit of time with Chloe. She’d declared that she just wanted to do something basic for her birthday– Jack had suggested an escape room, and she’d accepted with zero thought– which was extremely uncharacteristic. Something was off, and I wanted to get to the bottom of it.
As soon as I’d texted Amy to let her know we’d be going out, I gave Chloe a buzz. I knew she’d likely be playing video games at any given moment, so she was one of the only non-medical-provider people in the world I would ring instead of text. Otherwise, I’d have to wait for a save point to get a response.
“Yo,” she said on answer, and I could hear what I was pretty sure was theSilent Hill 2soundtrack in the background. “What’s up?”
“You and Lauren still on-again?”
“For now,” she said with a huff that told me it might not be that way for long. “I could do with a third-party opinion, but all we ever do is play games and fuck.”
I could have done without that image. “Well, how about tonight? Double date?”
The music stopped, and I figured she’d paused the game. “Wait, really? Because Lauren and I are already supposed to hang out later. Don’t you get my hopes up.”
“Yeah,” I said, shrugging as if she could see it. “Anil’s free to stay with Ethel, so let’s go out the four of us.”
“You beautiful bearded bastard!” she cried. “I owe you one. I’ll pick a spot and text you in a few.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I said. “I’ll add it to your tab.” But she’d already ended the call.
* * *
A few hours later,Amy and I walked hand in hand into the most overstimulating place I’d ever seen in my life. It was an adult arcade with video games, axe throwing, karaoke rooms, and crazy golf. Sound effects ricocheted around the room, I could hear a horrible rendition of “I Will Survive” coming from the supposedly soundproofed karaoke booth, and every few seconds there was the distinct thud of an axe lodging into a wooden target, all on top of the Eurodance pumping out of the speakers. I’d had a couple of dates suggest we meet there over the last couple of years since they’d built it, but I didn’t love the idea of handing a potential weapon to a first date, so I’d vetoed it, and thank god. I wished I’d done the same with Chloe.
Chloe and Lauren were already sat at a high table in the bar area with an almost empty pitcher of something pink. I hugged Chloe and nodded at Lauren, instantly getting the weird vibes Chloe was picking up on.
“How long have you been here?” I asked over the music as Chloe and Amy hugged.
“Just ten minutes,” she said, and my eyes must have gone wide or flicked to the pitcher unconsciously.
“There was a lot of ice.”
We might have made conversation, but I was pretty sure that was impossible given the decibels of the surrounding noise. So instead we paid for a round of crazy golf, during which Chloe kept foisting cocktails on Amy and me in the name of “maximising happy hour”. Amy and I had fun as always, but it was painful to watch how weirdly competitive Lauren was being, and how desperate Chloe seemed to win her approval, cheering for her like a football WAG and asking her every five minutes if she wanted a drink. I could tell Amy was curbing her own competitiveness in an attempt not to come across like Lauren, and I wanted to egg her on so she wouldn’t hold back, but she probably wouldn’t have heard me over the din.
We found a quieter corner after we finished, and I was left with Lauren whilst Chloe and Amy were in the loo. It was strange, because the moment we started talking, she seemed perfectly normal. She asked me about the D&D campaign, and she looked almost disappointed when I revealed Amy had taken over her character; apparently, Chloe had withheld that tidbit. We talked about all the costumes I’d been making, too; I told her about the chain mail I was crocheting for Grey, and she joked that she had a friend with a suit of armour if I didn’t manage to finish in time.
I’d been around Lauren plenty over the last year, so it shouldn’t have come as a surprise, but Chloe either gushed about her to the point that I already knew every detail of her life, or made her completely off limits. So it was nice to be reminded of the fact that she was just a normal, pleasant person when she and Chloe weren’t making each other crazy.
And they definitely made each other crazy. We tried axe throwing next, and Lauren critiqued Chloe’s form every single time to the point that Chloe nearly threw the axe at her. If Chloe wanted a vibe check, I’d need to make sure I told her what I thought when she didn’t have a sharp object in her hand.
I was surprisingly good at axe throwing, it turned out– I’d never been particularly sporty, so I’d assumed my hand-eye coordination would be shit, but I won the game by a country mile. I looked over at Amy when I made one particularly impressive hit, the axe lodging in the target just half an inch north of a bullseye, and she was looking at me like I was the fittest person on the planet. At least, that was how I chose to interpret the fact that she was literally biting her lip at me.
