“Jesus,” he said. “Phil must feel awful.”
“Well, it’s not his fault,” I said, not sure why I was defending him, but still.
“I know, I know. But he’s almost certainly blaming himself.”
“That he is,” I said under my breath.
“So why aren’t you there then? He must be freaking out.”
“Because your darling friend Philip broke up with me, that’s why.”
Jack recoiled in shock before almost immediately softening again, and the reactions were so contrary and in such quick succession that it made me snort.
“Yeah, well, I mean, obviously he doesn’t mean it,” he said.
I sighed. “Whether he meant it or not, he did it.”
“Yeah, but you know how freaked he gets about Ethel. He feels like he owes her everything, so he gets a bit tight-fisted about making sure everything’s perf?—”
“Do you not think I know that?” I snapped, more angrily than I’d intended. But come on, of course I knew all that. As far as Jack knew, I’d been dating Phil for months. And whether we’d been calling it that between us or not, we basically had been. And I’d been the one helping him look after her before that. I’d seen exactly how far his loyalty to Ethel went.
“Then maybe cut him some slack, yeah?”
I felt my eyes prickle with angry tears, and I swallowed hard, desperate to keep them at bay. “Sure, I’ll just let him say horrible things to me and treat me like I’m the least important thing in his life, because he doesn’t mean it.”
Jack’s face fell. “No, Amy, that’s not what I meant?—”
“And while I’m at it,” I continued, feeling myself get riled up, “I’ll just keep showing up for him in every possible way when he can’t even show up for me in the one way I asked him to. I’ll just accept that being left outside on a bench in the dark forfive plus hourswith no contact comes with the territory of being with someone who’s a caregiver.”
Jack’s mouth fell open. “Did he really do that?”
I couldn’t keep the tears back any longer, as fed up as I was with the amount of crying I’d been doing. “I know you love him, Jack. I know he’s part of the family. And I know you’ve been pushing for us to be together for a long time. But I’m so?—”
“No,” he said firmly, interrupting me, then leaned over to put a hand on my shoulder like Dad often did. “You’re right, I love him. He’s my best friend. And yeah, I think you two are good for each other. But you are mysister. You are my flesh and blood. And if he’s being a dick to you, then he’s a colossal idiot.”
I felt the ire leach out of me, as if Jack’s hand on my shoulder was absorbing all of it through my skin. “You mean that?” I asked, my voice breaking through my tears.
“OfcourseI do,” he said, scooting closer to me. “You’re the best of us, Amy. You always have been, even when you haven’t believed it yourself. And I won’t tolerate anyone, not even Phil, making you feel otherwise.”
I smiled and let out a soft sigh. “To be fair, like you said, he didn’t really mean it.” And I knew he hadn’t; still though, he’d said it, knowing what it would do to me. He was fully aware of how hard it had been for me to accept that he actually liked me for me, and he’d thrown that back in my face so easily.
“Hey,” Jack said, “if I’m not allowed to defend him, neither are you. Now come here.” He pulled me in for a hug, and I let him squeeze me tight like he had when we were kids.
“Thank you,” I said. “You have no idea how much that means to me, actually.”
“Probably about as much as having you around means to me,” he said as he pulled back. “Now come on. You need a cup of chamomile tea and a puppy cuddle.”
My eyes went wide. “You have a puppy for me to cuddle?”
He nodded. “I’ve got him today whilst Morgan’s at a work event.”
“Why didn’t you lead with that?”
“I figured you were upset, but I wasn’t sure if it would be a crying sort of upset or a throwing things sort of upset.”
“Throw things?Moi?” I joked as I followed him out of the room.
“Hah!” He laughed over his shoulder as he headed down the stairs. “Says the Aries.”
