“I know you didn’t want to hurt me.” I pushed him back and clenched my teeth so hard my jaw ached. “But you’re with them. You told me you didn’t work with them. You lied to me.” A tear rolled down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away. My hand came away with smeared old blood. I’d forgotten my face was splattered with it after I fought the vampires who’d captured me.
He jerked open one of the tall cupboards and pulled out a cloth and wet it under the tap. I sat in silence, watching the agony on his face as he gently wiped the dried blood and dirt from my skin. “Are you sure you’re alright? How badly did I hurt you?”
“I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. Your face is bruised, you have a fucking collar on, and you were taken by Dravyn. Belladonna almost made me choke you to death.” He sounded unhinged, panicked again.
I glared at him. I didn’t care if he felt sorry for what had happened to me. It was probably an act too. “I was there for all of it, Vander. I know. What I can’t get over is the deception, the truth of who you really are.”
He blinked back the threatening tears. “I’m sorry you had to find out this way,” he said softly. “But it’s not entirely what you think.”
I fisted my hands at my sides as fury set me aflame. “There aren’t enough sorrys in eternity for what you’re doing. I don’t care what half-truths or lies you want to tell me anymore. I won’t keep your secret. I’m telling Commander Locke.”
He pushed stray pieces of hair off my forehead. His touch was so tender it enraged me. He shouldn’t be kind to me. He was one ofthemand I was threatening him.
“I can’t believe I was such a fool. You’re looking for the daywalker spell?” I snarled. “I should kill you right now.”
“You’re not going to tell him. Will you let me explain?”
“No! And I am telling him. Unless he knows and is keeping your secret because he’s family. I’ll go to Commander Ace instead.”
“He doesn’t know and he thinks Oriana is dead. I’d like him to keep thinking that. It’s better if he thinks she’s gone thanknows what she’s become. And I’m not going to get the spell for them. If you will be quiet long enough to let me?—”
“Why should I believe you? I saw everything I needed to tonight. You like being a vampire, don’t you? All your talk about hating yourself wasn’t even true. You’re theirprizedassassin.”
He carefully wiped my throat around the metal collar, frowning at whatever he saw there. Bruising maybe. He’d squeezed hard enough to bruise. “I need to get this off of you.”
“You’re not going to say anything?” I snapped.
“What am I going to say, Aesira? You don’t want to believe me.” He shook his head. “I’m not going to deny working for them. I’m sorry you had to find out. I didn’t want you pulled into this. This is why I didn’t want to feel the way I do about you. This is why I fought it so hard and why I told you it was dangerous. It’s even more dangerous than you thought.”
“You don’t even feel remorse for being a traitor to LOA. You’re just upset you were caught. And what is it exactly that you feel about me? Hmm? I’m just your thrall, your source you’repossessiveover.”
His face hardened. “You know that isn’t true. I’ve never taken your blood before tonight.”
“So what am I then? You know what? It doesn’t even matter. I will be telling Commander Locke. You’re done. You can live here where you belong. If we see each other outside the wall, well, we’re enemies. Do with that what you will.”
“Then maybe I shouldn’t let you go back. You know you can’t escape me.” He tilted his head in challenge. The vampire side of him flashed, even his fangs showed. “We can stay here. There are plenty of rooms. Eventually we could build a nice manor down in the valley.”
He’d truly lost his mind. “We?We!I would never stay here with you.”
With a soft laugh, he tossed the dirty cloth into the sink and leaned back against the door. “What happened to all the ‘you’re my heart’ talk? You knew I was a vampire when you gave this to me.” He pulled the protection knot from under his tunic and let it dangle in the open.
“That was before I knew you were a snake.”
“The name Viper wasn’t your first clue?”
With a scoff, I sneered at him and lunged for my carving. Kace was right, he didn’t deserve to wear it. He caught my wrist, then the other, and spun me around to pin me to the wall. “Take it off,” I spit. “You are not my heart. You’re a traitor.”
“My feelings for you haven’t changed even if yours have. I’ll be keeping it, myaskair.”
“Don’t call me that. I am not your lover.” I fought against his grip. “I’ll give you your dagger back by shoving it into your black heart.” I jerked again to pull my hands free, but he pinned them even higher above my head.
“I guess I didn’t teach you how to get out of this situation. The worst thing you can do is get your hands caught.”
I rammed my knee up to hit him in the balls, but he shifted just in time for me to nail his thigh instead.
“Good one. You almost got me.” He shoved his thigh between my legs, and stepped on my toes, controlling me even more. “Now what?”
