AllFreeNovel
Share Us
‘I didn’t do much good, did I? I found them, curled up together, unconscious from the smoke. I carried them both outside, and a burning beam fell across my face as I came out of the door. But none of it mattered. They both died from smoke inhalation within the hour.’
‘Oh, Alex...’
‘If I’d been there—’
‘But how could you have known?’ Milly burst out. Realisation crashed through her, at what Alex had endured, what he had blamed himself for, for so many years. ‘That fire was not your fault.’
‘I might not have lit the match,’ Alex returned staunchly, ‘but I’m still to blame. I chose anger over empathy. I chose to seek personal revenge rather than to be there for my sister and her son, and as a result they both died.’
‘They might have died anyway,’ Milly argued, and Alex let out a harsh laugh.
‘You don’t really believe that.’
‘You might have died as well—’
‘No. The only reason Aganos came to my house was because he knew I wasn’t there. He said as much in court, when he was on trial. He’d been watching the house, watching me.’
‘Even so,’ Milly began shakily, but then stopped. She knew whatever she said right now was crucial; she felt their relationship might turn on the words that came out of her mouth, and that thought was terrifying, because the truth was she had no idea what to say, or even what to feel.
Perhaps Alex was right, and his sister and her son wouldn’t have died if he’d been there. Perhaps he’d let anger get the better of him more than once, but it had been a righteous anger, an anger fuelled by love and pain and the desire for justice. ‘You can’t torture yourself over this, Alex,’ she said finally. ‘Don’t live your life in the past...’
‘My sister and her son are dead.’ The words came out savagely as he turned to face her. ‘Because of me. And you say I should let it go? Give myself a break? Do you really think that, Milly? Or are you finally realising that I’m not the man you thought I was, have been hoping I was? Because that’s what’s been going on, isn’t it?’ His mouth twisted in a sneer, his scars pulling tight, his face a mask of derision. You’ve been starting to care for me, haven’t you, no matter what you’ve told yourself? You’ve been painting rainbows in your head and now you know that you shouldn’t have.’ Milly blinked, his words like hammer blows to her heart, shattering it like the fragile thing she knew it had always been.
‘You can’t say I didn’t warn you,’ he continued. ‘All I wanted out of this marriage was an heir, but perhaps it’s better that I don’t reproduce.’ He lifted his chin, his eyes glittering fiercely. ‘I’m not the man you’ve been wishing I was, Milly. Well, at least now you know. Before it’s too late.’
‘Too late for what?’ Milly asked, her voice and body trembling. He was pushing her away on purpose, she knew it, and it hurt more than she thought possible. Her illusions were shattered...not by what Alex had admitted to, but why he was admitting it. Because he didn’t want her to care for him. ‘Do you want me to walk away from you?’ she asked, her voice wobbling on the words. ‘Is that what this is about, Alex?’
He shrugged a shoulder, coldly indifferent to her plea. ‘You can do what you like.’
Milly swallowed hard, trying not to feel hurt. He wanted to hurt her, she knew that much, and that was painful enough, never mind the words he said. She was tempted to do just what he said—walk away. Save herself from any further pain. Except she knew she couldn’t make that choice. Wouldn’t. And yet she was so very afraid that what had been hoped to be a beginning was going to be an awful end.
‘I can’t walk away from you, Alex,’ she said, one hand pressed to her still-flat stomach. ‘Whether I want to or not.’
His mouth twisted. ‘Bound by our vows?’ he stated sardonically. ‘How quaint, Milly—’
‘No,’ Milly said, and now she really was shaking, both inside and out. How had it descended to this, so quickly? She pressed her hand flat against her belly, imagining the flutter of life she knew was inside her. ‘I can’t, because I’m pregnant.’
* * *
Alex stared at her for a full minute, the words taking that long to penetrate his dazed mind. He took in her terrified expression, her trembling hand on her belly.
‘Pregnant,’ he repeated tonelessly. ‘You’re sure?’
‘Yes. Very.’
He continued to study her, noticing how her lips trembled along with her hand; her gaze slid away from his. She couldn’t even look him in the eye. ‘How far along are you?’ he asked, suspicion creeping down his spine with cold fingers. ‘How long have you known?’
‘A...a little while.’ She still wouldn’t look at him.
‘Milly.’ His eyes narrowed as he took in other details of her appearance he hadn’t realised until now: her fuller face and breasts, the slight roundness of her belly. ‘How long?’ he demanded harshly.
‘A...a few weeks. I think we conceived on our wedding night.’ She spoke softly and Alex swung around, stalkin
g to the window as he fought a sweeping sense of betrayal—and hurt. That had been nearly two months ago. Why had she kept it from him? Why had she lied?
‘Were you ever going to tell me?’ he asked, his voice low and furious. ‘Or were you just going to hope for the best?’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’ Milly sounded near tears. ‘Alex, I was going to tell you. Of course I was. It’s just... I was scared.’
