“I know you already have a plan for your life, and opening yourself up to me like this is a threat. I promise, I will not be careless with your trust, May. You must know, your reputation will be well-protected. Unless you wish it, no one will know.”
May finally knew what was coming on all along: she was irreparably in love with the duke.
CHAPTER SEVEN
The Duke of Southam was not accustomed to losing control of himself.
He should have felt sated. Instead, his body had developed wishes of its own. Notthosekinds of wishes, although he would be lying if he said they vanished entirely… but rather held aback before a more urgent, stunning need for May.
He lasted the remainder of the day upon their return without tending to her or clinging to her side. He thought it would be a disservice. A protection. Elias wondered if he’d been a momentous fool instead.
The joy of being entwined in her limbs, moving with her, giving her pleasure and taking it himself… it lingered within him. And a small voice inside him kept asking for more, anyway.
Even the next day, he ached to hold her. To ask her how she slept. To give her cause to smile.
Those feelings echoed with a familiarity he’d gone through pains to forget.
He couldn’t have fallen in love. Lust, yes, fine, but love…? One did not simply just fall so hard, so fast.
He should know. Last time he was in love, he was a college man, with a tenuous grasp on responsibility and a careless abandon in his manner. He loved freely, without second thought, as young men are prone to do. In other words, he used to be wild; he’d since worked hard to tame himself.
But this? This was nothing like that. This was worse: he was willingly choosing to step into the abyss. His old impulses roared to life with a terrifying magnitude, but he was no longer that same thoughtless boy. If he let himself loose now, as he was desperate to, he would not be able to keep his promises. Not those he made to himself, but most importantly…
Elias vowed to protect May’s honor.
At home, he had to act as if nothing occurred between them. Though she was no cousin of his, the guise he had crafted for his accomplice could withstand no cracks. Yet what should have been an easy lie turned into pure torture. His eyes sought her out upon entering every room. His body tensed at the mere sound of her name. He was used to acting aloof. Where was the emotional detachment he had so carefully cultivated for years? His equilibrium? May had shattered it whole.
That would not do. Elias could not sit through another day of silence. He had to see her. It took mountains and mountains of paperwork to distract him until it was an acceptable hour to seek her out. But he did not count on getting caught as soon as he walked out of his study.
Hannah appeared outside his door like some sort of tracker hound.
“We are going for a picnic.” His sister’s hand closed in out of nowhere, dragging him with the determination granted only to younger siblings set on annoying the elder ones.
Picnic? That sounded like the last thing he wanted to do.
“After that dinner party, you cannot say no.” His sister eyed him expectantly. “We’ve done it your way. Can’t I have a say in how my marriage is to be marked?”
Elias resisted the urge to rub his forehead. What was meant to be a celebration of his sister on the cusp of a new life had turned into a stressful night, despite everyone’s best efforts. In the end, she was right. Everything he’d tried so far wasn’t working. He hadn’t caught Lord Spencer at anything underhanded, and the time he had until Hannah was out of his house for good, along with May, was rapidly coming to an end.
“Is everyone on board with this plan?”
“Of course.” There was no dampening her spirits. “Lady May looked positively animated.”
Did she, indeed?
“She is already in the carriage. Let’s not keep everyone waiting.”
That sister of his, she trapped him so skillfully. As he was pushed out of the house and toward the carriage, Elias stifled a sigh. This was not how he imagined seeing May for the first time after their intoxicating tryst. He wanted to see May alone, with every privacy afforded. Not sandwiched between his sister and her ill-advised choice of suitor.
It was just as awkward as expected. Not one person made eye contact as they took their spots. Elias thanked the years of building up his reputation for terseness as he refused to look away from the window. His sister left him to share the bench with Lord Spencer, as the most appropriate arrangement, but that only irritated Elias further. If she wanted her intended so much, then she should have sat with him, leaving May open for Elias. Was he not good enough to keep her company?
His own irrationality was a shocking discovery. But before he could make peace with this change of character, they were on the park grounds. Servants bustled around, arranging them by thelakeside with cloths, chairs, and blankets. The foursome sat on the covered grass, surrounded by wicker baskets stuffed to burst. The spread before them was lavishly arranged with wine, fruit, and cheeses. Elias reached for the newspapers, instead, as if the printed daily could distract him from this ridiculous reality.
He found that to work, in a way. As he angled his newspaper, his new line of sight afforded a direct view of May, who had gingerly picked up a cherry and placed it in her mouth. Her eyes fluttered closed as she ate. Elias’s fingers twitched as he watched. Those soft pink lips of hers demanded to be kissed. Appreciated. Treasured, exclusively by him.
His companions carried on, blithely unaware of Elias’s covert observation. Lord Spencer asked Lady May a friendly question, and, suddenly, it was as if a snake coiled about Elias’s abdomen. Why was the man looking at hernow, of all times? And if Elias’s plan was finally working, shouldn’t he be glad?
Elias tossed the newspaper aside.
