He tried with difficulty to be pleased with her interest in his cousin, failing spectacularly. Georgiana always looked forward to Richard’s company, too. Not for the first time, he wished he could let down his guard and be his true self around others. With his circumstances, it was impossible.
His sister, after the failed elopement, was also reticent. He suspected that Miss Elizabeth was born happy.
She said, “You are smiling. This must mean that you will soon be in company with your family and that you look forward to the prospect.”
Not at all.How could he explain to her that his thoughts were only of her? He was nonplussed. Shrugging, he said, “I am grieved to say that they do not plan to stop unless there is a problem with the carriage or one of them is ill. My aunt is a determined woman who, once she decides on a matter, will follow through expediently. From experience, I suspect they will not stop until nightfall other than to rest the horses. My sister is used to Aunt Helen’s habits since she spends most of her time with the family.”
“She does not stay with you?” Miss Elizabeth gave him her full attention.
He directed her around two men gossiping in the street before he answered. “I am a bachelor who spends a large part of my day managing my estate business. Until this summer, Georgiana has been away at school. In truth, we know little of each other.”
“How sad for the both of you.” She added, “Other than a few times when I have stayed as a guest at my aunt and uncle’s house in London, I am almost constantly with my sisters. Jane is the best companion in the world since she is agreeable to my suggestions. Mary, Kitty, and Lydia have interests much different than my own. Nevertheless, we have found ways to entertain ourselves through the cold winter months. It might surprise you to know that both Kitty and Lydia enjoy being read to as they untangle Mama’s thread spools. Mary, who prefers religious texts, will bend enough to act out characters from Shakespeare’s comedies. She is a wonderful Beatrice. When Lydia reads the part of Juliet, no matter how many times I hear her, she makes me weep with her portrayal. It is as if her heartbreak is sincere.”
Surprised by her comments, he never would have expected any depth of character from her younger sisters. He could not help but note, “Yet, none of your sisters aided you to build the great pyramid or the hanging garden of Babylon.”
Miss Elizabeth laughed. “As you might have noticed, I am taller than Jane. My other sisters were too young. They would have caused more work than they could have completed.”
“I see.”
“Tell me, Mr. Darcy, did you and your cousin ever have grand adventures when you were young lads? I cannot imagine two healthy, intelligent boys not coming up with some mischief.”
He stopped. Her interest in his cousin unsettled him.
“Richard is three years older than me. My cousin was born to lead, which is why he is an excellent colonel. He was always coming up with one idea after another when it came to mischief. I was the responsible one. It is my nature to consider consequences before I act.”
“I can see how that could be.” She tipped her head to look up at him. “You are much different than the colonel then, despiteyour similar backgrounds. It is the same with my sisters and me. Yet you seem to be particularly close to your cousin.”
“I am. I was barely out of the nursery when I realized that our futures would differ, much to my chagrin.” Darcy added, “Before I left for Eton, my father began training me to one day be master of Pemberley. He was the best of men, studious, hard-working, and diligent. After my mother died, my father gave his full attention to the estate. During his tenure, Pemberley prospered. His expectations for me to do the same are instilled deep in my soul. I cannot imagine living a life where my occupation puts me in constant danger (like Richard) because too many individuals and families are dependent upon me. Thus, even while a lad, I carefully considered my steps. Having inherited far younger than I ever wanted, I am grateful I was not frivolous in my youth. To put it simply, I cannot fail.”
He studied her expression, relieved to see empathy and compassion in her eyes. That she understood him melted some of the ice he always felt encapsulating his heart. If he was not careful, he…well, the danger was real. Elizabeth Bennet was someone who would not fit in his world, would she? What would his life be like if she was an intrinsic part of it? What would it be like without her?
Darcy rubbed his chest before they walked on.
CHAPTER 8
Elizabeth was the first to rise the next morning. If all went as usual, she would be the first to break her fast. Therefore, she was surprised to find her mother and father already at the table.
Their tension set Elizabeth on edge. She stepped back outside the room, apparently unseen by her parents, though she could see their reflections in the window. When she heard Jane’s name mentioned, she remained in place.
“You should have told me,” her mother hissed. “I cannot redirect my attention away from Jane. If she is to appear at her best before Mr. Bingley at the ball, then I cannot divert my time to some stranger who is coming to survey my home as his future residence.”
“He is my heir.”
“Be that as it may, I will not spend a farthing or one extra minute on his care or comfort.”
“I would expect nothing less.” Upon saying this, Thomas Bennet turned the page of the circulating paper he held and proceeded to ignore his wife.
It was an old argument that had no obvious resolution. Longbourn was entailed away from the female line. With theirsmall portions, should something happen to her father, the Bennet ladies would be impoverished. Despite knowing this, estate money poured through her mother’s fingers like water. In truth, her father’s as well. Francine Bennet constantly overspent to keep up the pretense that she managed the grandest property in Hertfordshire, even though everyone knew that designation belonged to Netherfield Park. Thomas Bennet filled his bookroom shelves to the point where there was no longer any room. Yet, he continued to buy.
For years, their mama rested all her hopes on Jane’s beauty to attract a wealthy husband, one who would willingly take on the rest of them. When that failed to happen, her mother began grooming Lydia, hoping a foolish rich man would overlook her senselessness and marry her. By that point, none of her matchmaking attempts were successful.
The other mothers no longer believed Francine Bennet’s boasts concerning Jane. Instead, it had become a sordid competition to see who would marry off her daughter first. Mrs. Long, Mrs. Goulding, and Lady Lucas all pushed their eldest in front of any unmarried man, whether he was appealing or not. Their motto seemed to beBetter to be married to an idiot than not married at all.
It disgusted Elizabeth. Jane was kind and gentle. The pressure placed upon her was intolerable. Yet, she accepted it as her due as eldest.
To Elizabeth, it was grossly unfair to treat a child like a piece of meat being bargained at the butcher’s shop. If only…
“Mr. Bennet, do listen to me for once. If Jane cannot catch Mr. Bingley then I do not know what we shall do since our girls will have little after you are gone.”
