“He has a way about him,” he went on. “Just when I think he’s bordering on aloof and probably forgot about the whole thing, he does something to remind me that he’s not going anywhere. Like today at lunch—we were at some diner in Fairfax, the whole crew—and he lands a hand high up on my thigh under the table. It was over in three seconds, but it was sofull of purpose and so close to my crotch that I almost choked on my food. It’s the most he’s touched me so far.”
I grinned. “That’s hot.” Ash was definitely taking his time with James, slowly driving him crazy—and telling him virtually nothing. I probably knew more about Ash’s intentions than James did.
I fantasized about the day I got to watch Ash destroy James almost as much as I dreamed about Ash being my Daddy. Almost.
It was equal parts liberating and frustrating, being so close to having our kinkiest dreams come true. We needed this to work. We needed Ash and Nathan to be happy and find their way back to each other. Because balance was key. So was personal harmony. James and I were so protective of what we had—that was just ours—and we believed our playtime partner, or partners, needed to share that same joy in their life outside the kinky parameters.
“Have you decided about tomorrow, by the way?” James asked. “I’m not picking up Emmett until later in the evening. There’s time if you wanna go out to Mclean.”
Ugh, did we have to talk about that now? Where was the fire? Tomorrow was a world away.
Shoot. I shouldn’t have told him I didn’t have work tomorrow.
He sent me a wry little smile, even though I knew he had endless patience. “Need I remind you that joinin’ Mclean House was your idea after years of rejecting the notion of being part of a community?”
Wait just a damn minute. He hadn’t wanted to join a community either.
“No, you needn’t,” I muttered. “I know I’m being silly.” I forked up more food and shoved it into my mouth.
“I wouldn’t call you silly—for that reason—but I do believe you’re worryin’ for nothin’.”
Maybe. Possibly. The Brat Squad did seem to like me, and I sure liked them a lot. Camden and I were equally obsessed with crafts and stuffs. Corey and Noa were super funny and sharp. Gael was sweet and also kind of calculating. I wasn’t at all surprised he’d screencapped that section before, for instance. He often told us to “save the evidence” when we discussed pranks and crap that Sadists said online. And Kit, our president, was one part goofball and one part “let’s focus so we can get this done.”
“I have an idea,” James said. “Tomorrow after work, Ash and I pick you up. We head out there for a quick visit—he can show us around—and then we go home again. And you let your brat buddies know you’ll be there. It’s short notice, so chances are most of them will be at work or have plans.”
I chewed and watched him hesitantly, thinking things over. It would be nice to see the place with my own eyes. I’d taken the 360-degree tour online twice already, and I was super curious. Also, Ash in his Daddy mode would find a way to make me comfortable. So would James, for that matter. He’d always been a pro at that.
And if one or two of the Brat Squad members had the time to stop by, I’d be over that threshold too.
“If I do this,” I said, swallowing my food, “can I get a cookie?”
James flashed a disarming smile. “You bet, baby.”
All right…
Why do you think he will react badly? He’s not some fuckboy on a hookup app.
But, ohhhh!
I clutched my stomach and continued pacing the hallway. I didn’t even know why; James had told me he and Ash would be late. I could run upstairs and hide under the bed for another hour.
Every time I walked past the hallway mirror, I flipped myself off because I was being ridiculous. And childish. And yeah, maybe I had a problem postponing things and procrastinating.
For starters, if I behaved like a reasonable adult, I would drive out to Mclean myself and let James and Ash know I’d simply see them there. They were on a worksite closer to Mclean anyway, so they would have to drive all the way over here, pick me up, and then head out again.Stupid.
How ironic was it that I thought everyone else was too slow doing stuff, and here I was, slower than a sloth?
The hits kept coming today, though, so I just wanted to hide. As if possibly meeting new friends and visiting House Mclean for the first time today wasn’t enough, James had reminded me I still hadn’t divulged all my limits to Daddy Ash.
My phone buzzed again, and I figured it was James.
Except it was Noa.
That dickhead is at the house today. Im gonna head out there now.
Oh no, that didn’t seem wise at all. I mean, I was happy he was all right—at least, that’s what he’d told me last night in a text—but messaging didn’t reveal everything. Corey and I theorized that Noa was angry. Which didn’t seem far off if he was, what, planning on confronting the online troll?
I texted back.
