“Oh g-gosh, nooo, Daddy!” she wheezed through her laughter.
“So you think you can attack Daddy and get away with it, huh?” I growled playfully and smooched her on the forehead. “Bring that ruler inside and start measuring instead.”
“Okay!” She giggled and panted as I let her down, and she wasted no time. She darted up the porch steps, with Micah close behind.
“I’m coming too!” he called.
“Your rooms are upstairs!” Ash hollered. “Feel free to explore.”
I blew out a breath and extended my hand to him.
He quirked a sexy grin and grabbed on.
I pulled him up, and once he was on his feet again, he did exactly what I needed. I needed it more than I thought I did, even. He hauled me in for the tightest hug and said all the right words.
“I’ve thought about you all day,” he murmured. “If I hadn’t been stuck out in Fairfax, I woulda crashed your lunch hour.”
I locked my arms around his neck and buried my face against his warm skin. I loved that new cologne on him, fresh and masculine with just enough spice.
“I would’ve loved that.” I breathed him in and pressed a kiss to his neck. “Especially since we got cockblocked this morning.”
“I know, right? Since when does Lily wake up that early? Fucking Christ.”
I grinned and eased back to look him in the eye. No fucking words—seeing his happiness, the crinkles at the corners of his eyes, the laugh lines, the silver in his scruff… But it was his eyes and his smile that did it for me. The most, I should say.
“I thought about you all day too.” I cupped his cheek and brushed the pad of my thumb over the faint scar on his cheekbone. A childhood bet settled on the playground, with Ash and Theo against two other neighborhood boys.
Every scar told a story.
He leaned in and kissed me and rested our foreheads together.
Even though his fears had almost wrecked us, they were also one of the most important reasons I loved this man with every fiber of my being. Because he was so protective of us, ofme, that he’d go to war against anyone who hurt me, including himself.
“Is everything okay?”
I nodded once and kissed him again. “Yes. But…I had a moment of… I don’t even know what to call it. I was unsettled on the way over.”
He inched back a little. “About what, the house? Us?”
“No.God, no. About…about what we’re about to embark on, I suppose.” I cleared my throat. That was a lot ofaboutin a few words. Damn nerves. Damn unease. “Seeing you with someone you’ve grown to care for—someone who can fill a pair of shoes that I can’t.”
He furrowed his brow in worry, and I could just tell he was ready to pump the brakes at any moment.
“It’s the same thing that scared you,” I was quick to add. “Fear of the unknown. Fear of losing you. I just…I understand what you wanted to protect me from.”
“Okay, but…you say the word, and we?—”
I shook my head and kissed him quickly. “I want to meet them. The sooner, the better. You’ll hold my hand through the whole thing.”
He didn’t see the lame attempt at a joke. “I’m never letting you go again, Nathan. The whole reason I’m comfortable with this—with us doing this—is because I’m certain about what we have. Our family comes first.Youcome first. I think I’ve already proven I can’t function without you, so…” He shook his head, searching for the words. Meanwhile, I was already relaxing. “I actually hope I grow to care for both of them deeply, but firstly, that won’t take away what I feel for you. There’s no specific amount of affection I get to distribute.”
I understood that, logically. “Our hearts grew with each of our children.”
“Exactly. Andsecondly…” He smirked faintly. “James and Jordan aren’t going to be my play partners. They’re hopefully gonna be ours. And I think they’ll trap you too. You’ll wake up one morning soon and realize they’re on your mind. You’ll smile to yourself because Jordan sent a cute text with a million emojis or he sent over monkey bread you can’t wait to eat more of or James blushed just because you touched his leg.”
I exhaled a laugh. That felt bizarre—but not unwelcome, of course. It was funny, though, how he was the one calming me down after I had been the driving force for this alternative for so many years.
“Not too long ago, I blamed you for not letting shit go,” he went on. “Now I’m thanking you for it. This is how we can have everything, baby. Yeah, it can be fuckin’ terrifying—but we know how things play out if we listen to those fears.”
