"Don't fuck it up" he says over his shoulder. "Just be yourself. If she's letting you in, she already likes what she sees."
The door swings shut behind him and I stand there for a second in the bathroom, looking at myself in the mirror.
I don't have a plan for this. I've never had a plan for anything in my personal life, just figured it out as I went. But this feels different. Trish feels different. And the idea of walking into that house and getting it wrong, of saying the wrong thing or coming in empty handed like some guy who didn't take the time to think about what mattered to her daughter, says I can’t half ass this. They deserve for me to put everything I have into this.
There’s one man who didn’t, and he’s not a part of their lives anymore.
I'm not putting this off. I want to be a part of their lives, and to do that, I’ve gotta show up and be that person.
By the time the shift briefing wraps up and relief confirms the truck checks, I've already got my keys in my hand. I change out of my station clothes, throw my bag over my shoulder, and head out into the early afternoon sunshine with one destination locked in my mind before the second one.
The county clerk's office sits in the middle of downtown. It’s one of the oldest buildings in Midnight Cove, and it shows. We’re close to the ocean here, and the salt has done a number on the outside, but it’s still one of the most loved structures here. I don’t go inside very often, and I’ve never gone in there for anything other than to renew my registration, but that changes today.
I push through the glass door and let my eyes adjust. There are a couple of people at the front counter.
“Hey, can you tell me where I can find Trish?” I ask one of the older women who doesn’t seem to be as busy.
She looks me up and down, smiling brightly before she nods. “Yeah, she’s down the hall, working property valuations today.” She points out the door, and toward a sign that hangs from the ceiling.
“Thank you, I appreciate it.” I find her at a desk that's got a shit load of paper on it and a sweating bottle of water, along with a half-eaten apple.
She looks up when I tap on the open door frame, and the expression that crosses her face cycles through surprised and then excitement before she seems to get it under control.
"Mark." She glances behind me like she's checking to see if anyone noticed. "What are you doing here? Is everything okay with Gunner?”
I take that as an invitation to lean against the door frame. "I wanted to ask you something."
"Okayyyy," she pulls the last letter out and tilts her head to the side, a smile spreading across her face.
"Will you and Cora have dinner with me tonight?" I watch her face carefully, my eyes moving down to where her fingers have gone still on the keyboard. "I know it's short notice. But I don't want to wait, Trish. I want to meet her, and I want to see where we can go from here. She’s important to you, so she’s important to me, and there’s no sense in holding off on that."
The silence stretches between us long enough to make me fucking nervous.
"Tonight," she repeats, like she can’t believe I’m asking so quickly.
"Tonight,” I confirm. “If that’s okay with you.”
She sits back in her chair and seems to roll the idea over in her head. I can literally hear her thinking out loud, but I don’t interrupt. The hesitation isn't about me, I don't think. It's about Cora. It's about protecting the person that matters more than anything else in her life, and I respect that more than I can say.
"She gets home from school at three fifteen," Trish says finally.
I breathe a sigh of relief, the tension of my body releasing as I smile. "I can be there by six."
She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth and then nods. "Okay."
Happiness blooms in my chest. "Yeah?" I verify to make sure, hoping that I’m not pressuring her into something she doesn’t really want to do.
"Yeah." She lifts her face up to me, and there's the ghost of a smile playing at the corner of her mouth. "Don't be late."
"Yes ma'am." I push off the door frame and point at her. "I'll see you at six."
I'm back out the door and into the sunshine before she can change her mind, and I already know my next two stops. The bakery for a chocolate cake. The flower stand by the farmer's market, because Gunner said bright and bold, and I'm going to trust that.
The afternoon passes in a blur of errands and anticipation for what I hope is going to change the rest of my life. I can't remember the last time I looked forward to something this much.
Whatever happens tonight, it’s going to change the trajectory of my life, and I’m not going to fuck it up.
Chapter Nine
