He wriggled free of Harris’ hold and backed away. “It’s not acceptable to come here drunk, wake me up and expect to have sex. It’s not the first time you’ve done this. And I’ve had enough. Go home.”Oh God. Did I manage to actually say that, not just think it?
Harris’ mouth had fallen open.
Yes, I did.“I’m not happy,” Kaden blurted, because what was there to lose now? “You’re not happy either. We should call it a day.”Not should. Just say it.“I don’t want to see you anymore.”
For a brief moment, shock lingered on Harris’ face before it went blank. Kaden hadn’t seen that dark, empty look before and fear flashed through him.
“Please leave,” Kaden said, while he still felt a little brave. Though not quite brave enough to omit theplease.
Harris’ sharp backhand came out of nowhere. Kaden’s head snapped to the side and he bit his tongue, crying out as he stumbled backwards and collided with his desk.Shit, that hurt.This had to stop. He should have stopped it the first time Harris had hit him.
“For fuck’s sake, Harris!” Kaden wiped his mouth with his hand and saw blood on his palm. “What is hitting me going to do apart from piss me off?”
“It makes me feel better.”
“That’s sick. Get out or I’ll call the police.”
Harris stepped into his space and grabbed him by the throat. “You don’t get to dictate when this ends, you snivelling little fuckwit.”
Kaden grabbed at his hand, pulling at his fingers, trying to get him off. “Yes. I. Do.” He choked out the words. “And it’s now. We’re done.”
Harris threw him to the floor and Kaden cried out in pain. Would those in the bedsit below hear what was happening and call the police? They might hear, but he doubted they’d call the police. Harris kicked him and Kaden cried out as he curled up trying to protect himself.
“I’ll say when we’re done,” Harris snarled.
“Get out of my bedsit.”
“You need teaching a lesson.”
The beating was vicious and accompanied by name-calling.Pathetic little shit. Useless wanker. Stupid fucker.When it became harder and harder to drag air in through his blocked nose, Kaden could only curl up and try to protect as much of himself as he could.This is the last time.That’s what he kept telling himself. This really was the last time Harris would get near him, let alone touch him.
This was the price for being too nice a guy.Too weak a guy.His own fault. That was what echoed in his head as he finally passed out.
When Kaden came round, he was lying face down on the floor. He kept his eyes closed and didn’t move. He had a feeling that the slightest movement would bring a deluge of pain, butthen he could feel that coming anyway. He didn’t sense Harris was still there, but he might have been.
Kaden waited, listening and not moving until a stab of pain made him shudder and suck in a breath. He tensed for Harris dropping at his side, for apologies to fall from his lying lips, a flurry of sorries, endearments, noises of concerntinged withyou made me do it,but there was silence. He opened his eyes to see he was alone and released a shaky sigh of relief. Except he hadn’t been naked and now he was.
Everywhere hurt. Kaden rolled onto his side and whimpered. He didn’t really want to move at all but lying on the floor all night would only make him feel worse. He was covered in blood and bruises and… He stifled a cry.How fucking dare he!He didn’t feel as if Harris had…Oh God, I don’t even want to think the word.But if Kaden called the police, he had a clear view of a future he didn’t want. Hospital, statements, questions, sympathy, scorn, disbelief…and it would go on for months if not years, him having to tell his story over and over and Harris telling lies. Kaden had to think about whathewanted and while he didn’t like the idea of Harris getting away with beating the shit out of him, maybe that was the lesser evil.
Kaden wanted to forget it had happened, forget he’d ever been seduced by a different version of Harris, forget how stupid he’d been. He wouldn’t be able to forget, but he could try to push it deep into his mind because he wasn’t going to let this wreck his life. It was a lesson learned. A painful lesson and part of it was his fault. He could hear his friends railing at him for that.None of it is your fault.Maybe not, but Kaden still wasn’t going to the police. He was alive. He hurt but nothing was broken. He didn’t think Harris had done more than beat him up and…Not going to think about that. He’d get better.
But he had to crawl to the bathroom, walking was beyond him. Stretching up to switch on the shower made him cry outin agony. There wouldn’t be much hot water, but there’d be enough to get clean, enough to remove the chill from his bones. He was covered in bruises and scratches. He could see Harris’ fingerprints on his skin. Water falling on him was a reminder that everywhere hurt. He didn’t have the energy to do more than curl up on the floor of the shower.
Only when the water started to cool did he make the effort to switch it off and grab a towel. Even drying himself was painful but he was already shivering with cold, maybe shock. He crawled back into his room and pulled on a clean pair of sleep pants. For some stupid reason that made him feel as if he was getting his life back to normal. His room was a mess but he could ignore that, deal with it later. He opened the door of the wardrobe. He couldn’t think Harris would have discovered Joe, but he wanted to reassure himself that he was still there. He was.
Joe shot out of the hat, over to Kaden’s foot and shimmied up his sleep pants, over his chest and stopped on his shoulder. One tendril came out and he stroked Kaden’s cheek. Kaden released a ragged breath. Did Joe know what had happened? His gentle touch almost made Kaden cry.
“I’m okay. I just need to sleep.”
He picked Joe up, put him back in his hat but left the wardrobe door open. When Kaden finally slid into bed, he sighed. He ought to have taken some painkillers but he didn’t have the energy to find them. He left the bedside light on. He’d never been afraid of the dark, but…Oh God.
~~~
Joe was torn between rage and worry. Harris was supposed to care for Kaden and he’d hurt him.Am I any different?Joe had been supposed to care for Lanu and he hadn’t. But he’d not struck him, not kicked him, he’d just not…helped him when he should have done. He’d wanted to help Kaden and he couldn’t.He’d tried to push open the door and failed. But even if he’d got into the room, then what? He was too small to hurt Harris, too small to protect Kaden.
Kaden had cried for help, called out in pain and Joe had never felt so helpless in his life. None of hisothershad been kind to him. No one cared. There was no one to complain to even if you dared.Otherswere always right. But not here. Harris should be punished for what he’d done. Except… A cold churning inside Joe made his hearts hurt. What he was planning to do to Kaden could be seen as far worse than what Harris had done.
4
