The sparkles fell off her fingers and gathered into a ball in the lantern, glowing brightly. More sparkles joined them, until the light, the power all rested within.
A deep sense of satisfaction washed over her, but then her stomach rumbled and brought her back to reality.
She closed the small metal door, and light gleamed out from the metal. “Stay,” she whispered. “Stay for me.” She stood, taking up her bow and arrow.
When she returned, dead rabbits in hand, the cave still glowed with the light of the lantern.
Amyu set about spitting the meat, but she couldn’t help the excitement building inside. She could use it, control it, see it. What else could she do? She bit her lip, thinking, remembering the light, the fire and heat and—
She happened to look up. The scorch marks were above her, glaring down, the black a stark contrast to the stone in the light of the lantern.
Amyu settled back on the bedroll, and watched the flames of a perfectly normal fire sear the meat. With regret, she tamped down her excitement. Fire was an element. It was both friend and foe. A force to be used, a danger to be feared. That was true of the other elements as well.
She’d go slow. Be cautious. Wary.
But the excitement was still with her when she stretched out to sleep. Her stomach was full, the lantern gleamed, and her dreams were filled with flying.
The sparkles hadfaded within the lantern during the night, but that didn’t dim Amyu’s excitement. She packed up her gear, wrapped the remaining meat for her nooning and started up the path, light of step and heart.
Until she rounded a bend and memory struck her like a stone.
Joden standing there, bruised and battered, his eyes crinkled in the corners by his smile. He pulled leaves from the tangles in her hair, standing close enough that she could smell the scent on his skin. He smelled of crushed pine needles, moist earth and spice. As he pulled at the tangles he let the leaves and sticks fall to the ground. They both started to laugh as they stood there, worn, weary, and alive.
He took care around the feather she had tied into her hair, carefully arranging it in front of her ear. His eyes warm and strong and—
It was like a physical blow to her heart. Amyu stopped in the path, pressed her hands to her chest, and let the pain wash over her.
Tears threatened. It had been the right decision to set him free, but her heart could barely beat in her chest. She made the choice; they both made the choice. Joden of the Hawk must become what he was destined to become and she—
She tipped her head back, and looked up at the mountain. At the trees swaying green in the breeze; at the blue sky above.
How in the name of the skies above and the earth below had that man become so important to her in such a short time?
Amyu stood for a while, letting herself feel all the anguish and heartbreak the memory brought. Then she dropped her hands to her side.
She had her own path.
She wasn’t going to sit and weep and waste away for lack of him. She was going to keep moving. Keep breathing. Find her own way. The pain of losing him would fade. Amyu took a step along the trail and then another, dashing away any tears.
The pain would fade.
But the regret? The regret would settle deep, forever in her bones.
She didn’t makecamp inside the tunnel-like cave where she’d found Joden. Instead, she went off toward the side, where she’d hunted game previously. Her thought was two-fold. If something went wrong, her gear and supplies would be safely out of the way.
If the ceremony she performed killed her, there would be evidence of her presence for searchers.
While that wasn’t the most positive of thoughts, it was practical.
She spent the rest of the day cleaning out the large cave of debris, and the remains of their campsite. She wasn’t sure of the reasons, but it felt right, and important somehow. She focused on that.
She didn’t think on Joden.
A ceremony invoking the elements was usually conducted under the open sky. But as she swept the cave clear, it felt more important to face the wall at the back. She compromised by placing herself at the halfway point between the back of the cave and the open ledge.
That night, she hunted and ate, and then bathed in the chill waters of the small stream. On the Plains, she might do a ceremony like this naked but it was not a requirement. While she wished to honor the elements she invoked, she felt more comfortable armed and armored. So that was decided.
She lay down on her pallet, under the blankets, blinking at the night sky and thinking she would never get to sleep. She started to rehearse again all that she planned to do and say… only to wake at the first light of dawn.
