I give in and start to laugh, and he rolls his eyes and waits me out. When I’ve calmed down, I say, “We’ve got a couple of hours before the last ferry. Want to see the island?”
“Don’t you want to help Logan?”
“No, he’s fine.” I only want to be with Xavier, but he doesn’t want to hear that.
“That’s surprising. You’re never happier than when you’re up to your elbows in engine grease. I remember that old Porsche you restored.”
I both love and hate that he knows me so well. Love because I want his attention on me. Hate because he’s going to take that away from me soon.
He looks around, and I follow his gaze. We’re standing in an area surrounded by a few shops and a cafe. Even at this time of the year, it’s full of tourists, and I watch Xavier blanch slightly.
“Let’s take the path around the island,” I suggest quickly. An idea suddenly occurs to me, brilliant in its simplicity. “I know a spot where we can wild swim.”
He turns to me. “Wild swim? What exactly makes it wild? Because I have to tell you, Reuben, that I might have averydifferent definition of that word.”
“I do know that. I think the whole world knows it, too.”
“So, we just get in the sea? How is that wild?”
I consider that. “We’ll be naked,” I offer.
“Oh,nowyou’ve persuaded me,” he says wryly. “Won’t it be freezing?”
“Let’s call it invigorating.” I’m enthusiastic now. I love swimming in the sea, and I suddenly want to do it with Xavier.
“Let’s not.”
“Come on. It’ll be fun.”
He looks down at Bernard. “What do you think?” Bernard had been looking in a meditative way at a nearby seagull and gives a soft bark. “Okay, we will come with you.”
I guide him towards the shore road on the left, and we walk along, following the track past barns and small cottages. Soon, we’re completely alone with not a soul in sight. The sea is loud, mixing with the rustle of the long grass in the wind.
Bernard let off the lead bounds along, investigating every grassy knoll with enthusiasm. Xavier and I walk in a comfortable silence. For such a livewire, he’s always been extraordinarily good at allowing quiet.
We come to the familiar gate, let ourselves through, and take the gentle slope downwards. Ahead of us is the blue gleam of the sea. The wind is cold as we walk across the machair dottedwith reminders of the sheep’s presence on the island, and Xavier fastens Bernard on his lead quickly.
His gaze runs everywhere, and he sucks in a breath, his face delighted as we come out on a long beach that stretches as far as the eye can see. It’s part pebbles and rock pools and part pure white sand. The wind is fierce, but the sun is bright, illuminating the sea to turquoise in patches in the shallows and a deep navy blue in other places. All we can hear is birdsong, the wind, and waves breaking on some rocks farther out. There’s a couple on the beach with a small dog whose shrill barking drifts up to us.
“God, it’sbeautiful,” he says softly.
“Camus Cuil an t-Saimh,” I say. I look over at him. His hair is wild in the wind. “The English translation is The Bay at the Back of the Ocean.”
He turns to me, his full mouth curving up in a delighted smile. “Really? That’s amazing.”
He starts down the sandy slope, and I hasten to catch up.
“Do you want a run, Bernard?” Xavier asks, but the puppy seems suddenly wary and cowers by his legs. “Oh no,” Xavier says immediately. He crouches next to the dog, who immediately huddles into the shelter of Xavi’s body. “It’s okay,” he says gently and very solemnly. “You don’t have to run around like the other dogs. Each to their own. The world would be a very boring place if all dogs were the same. Maybe have a stroll with us for a while and think deep thoughts instead.”
I’m torn between laughter and such a deep, warm affection for this extraordinary man who manages to be both the snarkiest bastard I’ve ever met and also the gentlest soul. Xavier shoots me a suspicious look, and I quickly clear my expression.
He stands up, and with Bernard at his side, we start to walk along the beach towards the far end where I usually swim.
The couple come near us, and we exchange greetings before moving on. A few minutes later, when I look back, they’re gone, and the beach is empty again.
Bernard seems to gain his confidence, and soon he’s straining at the lead. Xavi unclips him, and we walk slowly behind, watching as the dog bounds over the sand, intrigued by the water. A wave sloshes in, and he barks before looking back at Xavier.
“Go ahead,” Xavier calls. “You can be loud here.”
