Her dad wrapped her in a huge hug, holding on tightly. “Hello, my girl, how are you?” he murmured in her ear, before pressing a kiss to her cheek.
“Hi, Daddy, I’m good. Tired, but good. Newborns are a lot of work, even when they aren’t yours,” she replied with a smile.
He nodded knowingly. “Oh yes, I can still remember the sleepless nights when you had colic. I would go to work in a fog.” Her father was a high school English teacher, then eventually moved on to be a well-respected principal.
She giggled at the thought of him yawning his way through a lecture. “Sorry. Connor’s a great sleeper, and I actually don’t get up with him at night. That’s Noah’s job.”
Her dad chuckled. “He’s a good man, taking responsibility like that. And you’re a good friend for helping.” He looked at her closely before he continued, “I assume you’re still just friends? Or has being around each other sparked something more?”
Mel blushed. “Daddy, stop. We’re friends.”
“If you say so,” her father replied slowly, “it’s just, the way he looks at you, the way he always has, makes me wonder if he wants more than that. He’s a good man, sweetie.”
I know he is, just like I know I’m not right for him,she thought sadly. She smiled at her father, then changed the subject by tucking her hand into his arm and leading him toward the kitchen. “Got any of your homemade wine open? I could use a glass.”
For the first time in her life, Melanie struggled to eat her mother’s cooking. The delicious lasagne and salad sat like a rock in her stomach, as she battled with herself. Noah got along with her family so well and her parents and grandparents were in love with Connor, it was dangerously easy to pretend they were a family. Noah stayed respectful of her boundaries, treating her the same way he did before things started to change. Unfortunately, even back then, they had been fairly affectionate and teasingly flirtatious, so his arm slung along the back of her chair, his fingers brushing her shoulder, was all normal for their friendship. What wasn’t normal was how Mel reacted now. Every touch was like a spark of electricity, every smile he sent her way was like an arrow to the heart. But those sparks burned, and those arrows stung. Each one served as a reminder that her heart was closed, that she couldn’t have love and happiness, without the risk of pain and loss.
After dinner, Noah and her dad went to look at something in his workshop, while nonna cuddled with Connor. Mel was in the kitchen, washing dishes with her mother, and was so caught up in her inner turmoil that she didn’t realize her mother had said anything, until Lucia flicked some water onto her arm. Mel startled, and looked up from the pot she was drying to see her mom standing there with her hand on her hip, and a frustrated look on her face.
“Melanie Isabella Haynes. Did you hear a single thing I just said to you?”
Mel looked sheepishly at her mother. “Sorry, Mom. I guess I was just lost in thought.”
“Mmhmm, and would those thoughts be about a handsome man and his adorable baby? I realize I said I was worried about you getting hurt, my love, but to see you with Connor in your arms warmed my heart. And Noah, he looks at you differently now. Has something happened between you two?”
Her mom had always been perceptive, so Mel knew she couldn’t lie.
“Yeah, something happened. But I can’t let it go further, Mom. You were right. I can’t take the chance of being hurt again, not after what Darren did. Love and a family just aren’t in the cards for me anymore.” She shrugged her shoulders and went back to drying dishes, trying to pretend her heart didn’t ache as she said that.
“Oh, Melanie, honey.” Her mother pulled her into a hug, then stepped back, still holding on to Mel’s shoulders. “I know your divorce was hard, but I didn’t think it had made you give up on love. No man should have that power, certainly not that silly man you married.” Lucia rolled her eyes, and Mel had to crack a smile. Her parents had not been big fans of Darren.
But as Mel stood there, in her parents’ kitchen, absorbing the warmth, love and happiness that had filled the evening, she felt her eyes brim with tears.
“I think he broke me, Mom.” The tears spilled down her cheeks, and her mother silently folded Mel into her embrace. Mel let the tears fall, and realized she needed to tell her mom everything that had happened.
“You know he couldn’t handle the fact that I would never be able to have kids.”
“Because he wasn’t a real man, able to love and respect a woman the way she deserves,” her mother interrupted with a frown.
Mel smiled through her tears. “Yeah, it gets worse, Mom. I never told you this, but the day we met at the lawyers to sign the final paperwork, Darren didn’t come alone. He brought along his very pregnant secretary and made it pretty clear it wasn’t a new relationship. I wasn’t good enough for him, and he wanted to make sure I knew that.”
“Oh, Melanie.” Her mother’s eyes also filled with tears. The two women stood there, holding each other, sharing the pain of what Mel had gone through at the hands of her ex-husband.
After a few minutes, Lucia pulled back and used her thumb to wipe Mel’s tears.
“Honey, listen to me. Your infertility is not your fault. We’ve talked about this, about the genetics. Darren had no right to blame you, if anything he should blame me. As for his infidelity, that is completely his fault. He was too weak to stay loyal to you and your marriage. He was too shallow to see past your difficulties and love you for the woman you are. He was too insecure to respect and admire your dedication to your work. Your marriage fell apart because of him, not you. Do not let his character flaws scare you away from a good man like Noah. What you had with Darren was not true love. But the way Noah looks at you, as if he is the earth orbiting around your sun, that is love. That is how your father looks at me, and that is the way you deserve to be loved.”
Fresh tears fell down Melanie’s face. She had always longed for a love like her parents had, but after Darren, she had given up on that dream.
“I’m just so scared, Mom,” she whispered.
“Of what, my love?”
“I thought I had found my true love in Darren, I thought we would have a good life together. And then he ripped it all away from me. What if… What if Noah is the same? What if I let myself love him and Connor, and then he changes his mind? I would lose even more. I would lose everything.”
“Love is always risky, honey. Pain is part of life. But the right love, is worth that chance. And if you never take that chance, you’ll lose them both no matter what. That man is made to love. He will have a family one day, and you can either be a part of it, or not. I think you have to ask yourself, what would be worse. Loving Noah, even with the risk of being hurt, or losing him and guaranteeing you will be hurt.”
Her mother’s words stayed with Mel long after they went home and put Connor to bed. She and Noah sat on the couch watching TV, and she thought about what her mother had said. She would lose them both if she didn’t let down her walls and let herself admit her feelings for Noah. But letting down those walls meant opening herself up to the chance of being hurt far worse than how Darren had hurt her. Because Noah and Connor, she realized, meant more to her already than her ex-husband ever had.
