I slowly slide down until I am standing in front of him, but he keeps me wrapped in a tight embrace. I’ve always loved how I fit in his arms, my head resting in the middle of his chest. I breathe in deeply, feeling his chest rise and fall and his heart beat strongly beneath me.Home. That’s what Mac is to me, he’s home in every sense of the word. He is where I belong.
My stomach growls loudly, interrupting the moment. Mac chuckles and steps back, taking my hand and leading me into the kitchen where the source of that tantalizing aroma is revealed.
“You made shrimp linguine?” I’m drooling. This is one of his mom’s recipes and I’ve always loved it.
He walks over to the stove and stirs something, then turns his head over his shoulder to give me a grin. “Only the best for you.”
I settle down on a stool to watch him. “When did you learn to cook? In high school you burned toast.”
He turns to me, pours a glass of wine and pushes it across the counter. “After college, I kind of had to learn. Living by myself and not wanting to survive on takeout meant I was begging Mom for lessons over video chat.” He looks sad and I know he’s worrying about her.
I walk over to him and wrap my arms around his neck. “She’ll be okay.”
He nods, but his smile doesn’t reach his eyes, and when he moves back over to the stove, I know he doesn’t want to talk about her anymore. I return to my stool and think carefully over how to phrase my next question. I’m curious about his life all these years, but don’t want to seem nosy or jealous.
“Was your mom the only one to teach you to cook?” I ask casually, but Mac sees right through me. He cocks an eyebrow at my question and folds his arms across his chest. The motion makes his biceps stand out against his shirt and I raise my fingers to my lips to make sure I’m not drooling.
“There was no one serious, if that’s what you’re really asking.”
“No one?” I’m skeptical. Ten years without a girlfriend? Seems too good to be true. But Mac just shrugs and nods his head.
“I mean, I dated, sure. But just casual. No one I felt strongly enough about to have in my home day after day. Certainly no one I ever wanted to cook for.”
This floors me. For some reason, this confession means more to me than any other declaration of love he could have made.
“Wow,” I say softly.
“What about you?”
I shake my head. “No one important. A few dates, but nothing really. It’s hard to date on an island where you grew up with everyone.”
He chuckles at that. “Ain’t that the truth. That was always the thing with us, wasn’t it? I’ve known you since we were kids, everyone knew we were friends, and we didn’t know how they would react to us suddenly dating.”
I nod. “Exactly. And if we broke up, it would have been so awkward seeing each other everywhere.”
Mac stands up abruptly and turns back to the stove. “Yeah, well, that sure as shit turned out to be true.” His voice is gruff and I can hear the lingering pain and frustration in his words.
My heart aches. I didn’t mean to bring up our past like that and suddenly there’s a weird tension in the air. I’m debating whether or not I should say something when Mac takes a deep, audible breath, then turns to me.
“I’m sorry, T. I said we should move on from the past. We’re here now and I’m not going anywhere. No more awkwardness, no more pain.”
I want so badly to believe him. I want to believe that he’s not going anywhere, but I’ve got to talk to him about his plans, and I need to do it now. Before I’m too far in love with him again to survive him leaving again.
Chapter eleven
Mac
Sure screwed that up, idiot.I wish I could hit myself for saying that. I can’t claim that we need to move on and then say shit like that. Tawny’s gone quiet and my plan for the evening is quickly going off the rails. I wanted to woo her with a candlelit dinner and then tell her my news from my meeting with Marcus. I envisioned a perfect night, hot sex, and best of all, Tawny finally being fully invested in us. Instead, I stuck my foot in my mouth and made things tense. What a fuck up.
I serve up dinner and carry it to her dining room table, which I’ve set with roses and candles. It’s cheesy as hell, but I’m hoping she likes it anyway. Tawny follows me with her wine glass, so I go back and grab my glass and the bottle. Once we’re settled, I raise my glass and look at her. She’s glowing in the soft light. How goddamn lucky am I to get a second chance with this woman?
“To us. Past, present and future. We’re here now, and I for one, couldn’t be happier.”
We lightly clink our glasses and dig into dinner. She doesn’t say anything after my toast, which eats at me. There’s something wrong and I don’t know what to do.
The silence grows as we eat, along with my anxiety. When she finally finishes, I stand up from the table and take her by the hand, leading her to the couch. We sit, side by side, but Tawny shifts slightly so she isn’t touching me.Fuck. This is bad.
“T, what’s going on? You’ve been quiet ever since my stupid comment before dinner.”
