Tears track down my cheeks, and the force of my knees slamming into the ground makes my teeth clank together. The discomfort and horror of what I'm feeling now has nothing on what Vivian experienced.
Jarek doesn't touch me. He doesn't coddle me or try to make it better; he just stands there with his pack alpha on his knees in front of him.
"She saved herself, Jarek. Vivian, our sweet fucking omega, sacrificed herself to get them out of there. She provoked those monsters into hurting her over and over again. Who—who does that? How could she do that?!
Jarek kneels and audibly swallows. "Someone who is very,veryfucking strong and devoted to herself and her pack. She wouldn't give in because she reserves that gift for us, Kade. Vivian would rather be beaten down than give any part of herself to monsters."
Forcing my head to lift and see the light of day, I plead with my mate to make it make sense. "Fuck, Jarek. How can you be so accepting of this?"
He chuckles a humorless laugh and presses his palms into his eyes. "Because I can't spank her ass or fault her for being literally the strongest, bravest person on the damn planet. What she did, Kade..." He trails off with a shake of his head. "Was tragically honorable. You heard Riot...how she stood her ground wasn't normal. But Vivian isn't normal. She's fucking epic and different. Letting her feral side out in unknown, dangerous territory is exactly who she is. We've never suffered an experience where we've had to witness it or rely on her ability to charge into battle, but I'm proud of her."
"But you want to spank her for putting herself in danger," I remind him, still trying to grapple and understand all the shit that's slamming into my skull.
Jarek hangs his head and laughs softly again. "Of course. But this is Vivie. We knew she had claws and sharp little teeth when we met her. I'm glad she knew how to use them for what she believed was right."
"Fucking hell. I wish Riot had been in the same damn cell as her so one of us could have protected her."
"Me too, Alpha. Me too..."
"He tried to fight for her just like we did..." I murmur, sinking onto my ass in the grass. "She didn't need any man, though, did she?"
"Oh she did, but we have a stubborn one, huh?" Jarek teases and tilts his head back to feel the sunshine on his face.
"I love you," I murmur a bit later. "I love Silas. I love Vivian. I love you all so much ithurts."
"Sometimes it really does hurt, doesn't it?" Jarek replies thoughtfully. "I love you too. Come here," he urges and backs himself up against a tree. "Take a rest. Silas has them safe and comforted."
I rest my head in his lap and close my eyes. I need to be comforted and vulnerable too. Just for a moment...
Seven
Silas
Iknow when my woman is struggling, and right now, she's obviously deep in the pit of her depression. Writing her statement wasn't good for her mental health. Or maybe it encouraged her to start processing? I have no fucking clue, but I don't like how her eyes are half-lidded or the way she's been zoning out at the wall for the past thirty-five minutes.
She needs her fucking nest but we're stuck here, hours away from home and her comfort items for at least another day. At least here we have officers keeping watch in the hallway.
"Here, princess," I murmur, removing my sweatshirt and wrapping it around her chest.
She sighs audibly and snuggles into the fabric. It's nowhere near the same as being surrounded by her nest that smells of our pack. She blinks over at me and I about cry in relief.
"Hi you," I breathe. "You back with me?"
Shrugging, Vivian curls up on her good side and nuzzles my hand. I don't expect her to say anything, so when she zones out again, I'm not surprised.
"Does it bother you when she doesn't respond?" Riot interrupts my worried thought process. Kade and Jarek aren'there, so I guess it's up to me to start making him understand my omega.
Glancing down at Vivian, I catch her eyes and raise an eyebrow.Do you want me to talk about you like you're not here?She nods and waves her hand as if it doesn't bother her. I wonder if she'd rather us tell Riot some of the harder things about her.
"She does respond," I murmur, using my other hand to comb through her matted hair. "Vivie is very active in our bond. Right now I know she needs me to just be here to help hold her together with love and support. Her shrug says she doesn't have the energy to talk, but she encouraged me to explain to you with the motion of her hand."
Riot narrows his eye at me, but it seems more thoughtful than annoyed. "But, like, how do you know that for sure?"
I chuckle gently, remembering all the times I fucked up when we were getting to know each other. "Many errors of judgment over a long period of time. We've known each other for eight years. Just like any other relationship, it took time to learn about each other."
Vivian huffs, and I catch the end of her rolling her eyes. I lightly tug on a lock of her hair with a smirk, but it quickly dies when she stiffens.
"Don't do that," Riot hisses, sitting up straight. "She was drug around by her fucking hair."
