I sucked my teeth, knowing I had a tendency to get loud whenever I was pissed off. “My bad.”
“Can’t you just be happy for me?”
“I could never be happy knowing you’re miserable, Lex, but enjoy your big day. I won’t be there to see it.”
“Wait, you’re not coming now?”
“Nah. I close on my house two days before your wedding, and the movers are coming that Saturday morning. It’s probably for the best anyway, given our history.”
She huffed as her head shook from side to side. “You’re right.”
“I still wanna know what brought on the change of heart.”
Lex twisted her hands around each other as she began to explain, “You remember I told you about Pat’s grandfather’s health?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, a few days after we got back from the cabin trip, there was an emergency where he went missing for a couple of hours. No one could find him, and it was really traumatic for the family. I don’t know. Seeing that, it put something into perspective forme. We ended up talking more and decided to go through with the wedding and make his family happy.”
I caught a glimpse of the scowl on my face in the mirror. She had me fucked up. “What about your happiness? Who’s making sure you’re happy? Who’s taking care of you? Because I know you got that ring on your finger and this pretty ass dress on and shit, but I’m not fuckin’ convinced that he’s capable of taking care of your heart,” I asserted.
Her jaw clenched. “Can you pleasenotmake a fucking scene here?”
“If not here, then where, because you got me fucked up. Since when have you let other people live through you? Since when have you let other people influence your decisions?”
“I’ve made my decision. I’m getting married, Oak. End of story. Okay?”
I sucked my teeth. “Yeah. You fuckin’ got it.”
She’d made her decision. If she needed to be with a nigga who vibrated on a lower frequency, then so be it. From here on out, whatever happened between them was no longer my concern. Lex and I had officially reached our expiration date, and I had to let her go, even if it was the last thing I wanted to do.
When I made my way back to my truck, I realized I’d left Yasmine on read for the last couple of hours and decided to hit her back. My eyes scanned her last message to me before my fingers began jabbing at the screen with a reply.
Me:
Drinks tonight sounds good.
My wedding was weeks away,and everything was still so royally fucked. I couldn’t pretend that watching Oak walk away from me didn’t have me in my feelings. Why hadn’t I had the backbone to tell him that I was still going through with the wedding when he gave me the charm? Maybe it was because I was afraid of what his reaction would be, and I was trying to dodge more drama. Maybe it was because I hadn’t been able to stop messing with the moon charm he’d given me that evening that reminded me of our time at the cabin. Or maybe it was because I didn’t want to hear him say all the right things that would talk me out of my decision. What would be the point if we both knew we could never be together in the long run?
The sparkly dress still clung to my petite frame, feeling more like a straitjacket than a custom-made wedding gown. Oak’s questions remained on repeat in my head as I started to redressinto the two-piece sweatsuit I’d arrived in. Who was taking care of me? Who was ensuring my happiness? Was I still walking down the aisle because I was in love with Pat or just doing it for Poppy? I felt like DMX asking the Lord to give me a sign. Not like a metaphorical one that could be interpreted a few hundred different ways. I needed one that either said “run, bitch” or “stay.” Simple as that.
Amid hanging and zipping up the dress in its protective bag, Pat called.
“Hey.” I greeted him gently.
“Lex, Poppy’s being rushed to the hospital. They think he had a massive stroke.”
From the tremble in his voice, I could tell he was scared. In the blink of an eye, so was I.
“Oh my God! W-what hospital?” I stammered, heartbeat racing.
“Northwestern.”
“Where are you?”
“I’m on standby right now, trying to catch the next flight out of New York. But if I’m not on one in the next hour, I’ll find a car, and I’m hitting the road.”
I knew how desperately he wanted to see his grandfather, but I was also aware that the roads were crazy and he didn’t need to be driving under so much duress.
