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Laurel nodded and rolled her eyes. "He didn't see anything. If we need tending, our men make us their top priority."
I frowned. "I think my three are more private. While they like to share, they each also like to spend time alone with me," I admitted. "That's why it's been three days. While they...took me together," I blushed, but continued, "they also wanted time alone with me."
"See? They are needy," Ann commented.
"You are happy?" Emma asked. A baby's cry came from upstairs and she smiled. "Ellie's awake."
"Don't you have to get her?"
Emma shook her head and began to undo the bodice of her dress. "No. Kane and Ian dote on her terribly. One little whimper and they are checking on her. One of them will bring her down to me since she's hungry. Now, before they get here, are you happy?"
I thought about that. Rhys, Cross, and Simon had been nothing but kind to me. Attentive, thoughtful, aggressive, dominant, passionate.... The list was long, but none of them, except perhaps them sticking a plug that Rhys had made into my bottom, but otherwise...I was happy.
"So far, yes," I replied, for I thought that was a safe answer. There was a niggle of concern though, for the men were quite secretive. They knew much more about me than I did of them. That could be resolved over time, but not if they didn't share.
"I have a feeling they had difficult pasts," I surmised.
We heard heavy footsteps and silly talk at the same time.
"That would be Ian and Ellie," Emma said, smiling as she adjusted her dress and shift so her breast was exposed. "He's a big brawny man but melts as soon as he gets near his daughter."
In came Ian cradling a baby in his big arms. While Ellie was three months old, she appeared tiny being held by such a large man. He was crooning something to her in a different language, perhaps Gaelic. He kissed the baby's dark hair, much the same shade as her mother's, then handed her off. Emma settled her against her breast. Ian watched his wife and baby for a moment, leaned in and kissed the top of Emma's head almost reverently, then left.
Watching Emma with one of her doting husbands made me feel wistful. While Uncle Allen had doted on me and loved me, he'd had a secret family on the side, one he hadn't wished to include me in. Yes, I'd been involved with the Tannenbaums from the beginning, even being friends with their son, Tyler, who had moved to Billings the year before.
Tyler was two years old than I was, and we'd grown up together. His parents doted him on, but the Tannenbaums weren't his only parents. He had Uncle Allen, too. Was he Tyler's father, and I had never known it? They'd kept me on the periphery all this time. Surely Tyler knew the arrangement of his parents—two fathers and a mother, perhaps he'd even known we were actually cousins—while I hadn't known a thing. My parents had died in a stage accident, leaving me behind on their way to Bozeman.
Finding out about Uncle Allen’s secret life had left me feeling somehow betrayed, as if I’d been an outsider all along.
I felt like an outsider now as I watched Emma, Ian and their baby. The bond was there between them, and with Kane as well. The other women had a place on the ranch, each of them a loving life with their men. But me? I was lost. I felt...extraneous and out of sorts. I didn't really know anything about Rhys, Cross or Simon and that only added to my discomfort.
Once Emma had the baby settled down to nurse, they glanced at each other, then at me. The meal was forgotten, at least for the moment. "You asked after their pasts. I think they've all had hardships, Ian especially." Emma looked both wistful and angry, probably because she wanted to protect her man from the burdens of his past, but couldn't. "I've heard some of what happened to them—Simon and Rhys—in Mohamir, for Ian is the one wanted for the crimes he didn't commit," Emma told me, her voice bitter. "But none of the men have shared details of what the crimes actually are, other than that their commander, Evans, killed innocent people."
"Simon woke up from a nightmare the other night, calling out the word alea, but I don't know what it means, or if it is something in that country's language or a name. When I asked if he was all right, he said 'dinna worry yerself' and held me as he fell back asleep." I shrugged. "He just seems to carry the past with him more heavily than most. Cross, too. He wasn't even with them in Mohamir. He's hinted at a terrible childhood, but again, he won't tell me more."
They all held secrets, it seemed. Everyone held secrets from me.
Laurel looked understanding. "Your men are more reserved, as we don't know much either. They'll tell you in time, if they choose. Just be there for him, tend to them as much as they tend to you. They might be big and formidable, especially Simon, but they have their weaknesses, they just don't show them often."
"Don't forget the biscuits," Emma reminded Laurel, who went to the oven to check on them.
"Their biggest weakness is now Olivia," Ann said, moving out of the way for Laurel as she stirred a pot on the stove. "They've taken on your enemy as their own."
When we arrived for lunch, Rhys told everyone about how we met, the threat to my life by Mr. Peters and now I felt guilty, for in truth, besides protecting me through marriage, my men would also have to defend against anything he might do. They'd assumed my burdens, even though they seemed to carry plenty of their own. Had they done this because they felt guilt at buying the horse from the man who may have burned down my house?
"I'm glad it doesn't bother you that the stud horse they purchased came from him," Laurel said, passing by me with a handful of cloth napkins to place on a tray.
I paused in the middle of a cut, knife in the air. While I hadn't forgotten that the men bought the horse from Mr. Peters, I'd put it to the back of my mind. It raised questions I hadn't considered before - questions that only now came about as I was married and entrenched in Bridgewater.
I stood and offered a small smile, wiping my hands together. "Will you excuse me for a moment?"
The ladies looked at me with surprise since I'd abruptly stood and wanted to leave in the middle of a conversation, but nodded. I left the kitchen and followed the men's voices to the room off the front entry. Comfortable chairs faced a cold fireplace. With eleven men in the room, they sat in the chairs but also leaned against the wall, relaxed and in easy conversation. When they saw me, they stood. While they all looked at me, the only men whose gazes held heat and possession were my three.
Rhys came over to me first, followed by Cross and Simon. "Is everything all right?" They gazes raked over me as if confirming nothing had happened to me in the short duration I was out of their sight.
"Why did you keep Mr. Peter's horse?" I asked.
Simon's brow quirked at the question. "Is there something wrong with the animal?" he asked.
