I can still recite it by heart.
Marnie’s gone, and I have nothing else to live for. I’m done fighting for a better life. Goodbye.
We planted his hat—even though he never wore it—at the mouth of the river. The rapids were harsh that time of the year, thrashing and raging, the white water frothing as it slammed against jagged rocks. I can still hear the roar, the current twisting and writhing, pulling in every direction at once. It could easily drag a person down, especially someone who wasn’t a strong swimmer.
Someone like Jake.
Then he left, with only a backpack full of clothes and food, a few grand from the money we stole—a small enough amount that the others wouldn’t notice—and Old Man Larson’s pocket watch.
A week later we buried him.
Well, not him. His body was never found. We buried a memory. I grieved him, let the world grieve him, because that was the only way to make it real.
Except it wasn’t real.
And now, standing in this room, with Brett pacing like he’s about to put a fist through the wall, with Sienna following him, desperate to help him, with Emily looking at me like she doesn’t recognize me anymore, and Jake standing there, flesh and blood and breathing, I feel the weight of it all crashing down.
What a great time for June to come barreling toward us, clad only in a towel. “Why do you all look so glum?” Then she turns to Jake with her signature flirtatious smile. “And who mightyoube?”
No one speaks.
“Well?” June secures her towel. “Anyone? Bueller?”
Jake shifts against the wall, exhaling like he already regrets showing up.
Brett stops pacing. He balls his hands into fists, his jaw tight. He may well attack me again, and I won’t stop him. He deserves to take a shot at me. All this time, and I never knew the truth about his feelings for Jake. I took away his first love. Granted, I was protecting Jake, but still…
How would I feel, this very moment, if someone took Emily away from me?
God, Emily…
She doesn’t move, but I can feel her stare, like she’s waiting for me to crack open and spill the truth she knows I’m keeping from her.
June’s gaze flicks between us, her voice sharper this time. “Somebody better start talking.”
Brett doesn’t wait. “We’re all waiting for that. But River here doesn’t seem too eager to explain why Jake—a guy we all thought was dead—is standing here in this damned mansion.”
June’s eyes widen. “Excuse me?”
I say nothing.
This may be Brett’s business, even Emily’s because she’s involved with me, but I know for damned sure it’s none of June’s.
Emily shifts, stepping closer. “River. Tell me the truth.” Her voice is softer now, but it still cuts deep.
I want to tell her the truth.
I want to tell her I love her. That I should have said it before I left, after she said it to me.
But Emily, as much as I adore her, is new in my life.
Brett is my oldest friend, and I owe it to him to talk to him first.
I clear my throat. “Emily, could you take Sienna and June out to the deck, please?”
“Oh, hell, no,” Emily says.
“Please.” I walk toward her, cup her cheek. God, it’s like the softest satin. “I’ll explain everything. Just give me a few minutes.”
