Jake doesn’t answer. He just exhales, slow and deep.
“I went to your funeral. Put flowers on an empty box. I cried like someone had carved me open from the inside.”
“Brett…” His voice is rough.
“I’m in love,” I say, surprising myself.
It’s true, but it’s not what I brought him here to tell him.
“With Sienna?” he asks.
I cock my head. “It’s that obvious?”
“On her end, it is. The way she looked at you. Plus, she’s a knockout. Totally your type.”
The way Jake said “knockout” grates on me. Is he attracted to Sienna? Doesn’t he have a woman back in Miami?
Fuck. Who the hell am I jealous of, anyway?
“Not on my end?” I ask.
“Hard to tell. All three of you were astonished when River showed up with me.”
I rub my eyes against the salty breeze. “I love her, man. Totally. And the thing is… It’s only the second time in my life I’ve felt that way about someone.”
“Oh?”
I nod. “And the last time was twenty years ago.”
He shuffles his feet. “Back in high school? Bridget Monahan?”
Wow. I haven’t thought about Bridget Monahan in ages. She was a member of the freshman drill team, and damn, she had a rack on her. We popped each other’s cherries when we were both fifteen. It was great, but I didn’t love her.
“No, not Bridget,” I say. I pause, gathering my strength once again. “I was in love with you.”
Jake goes still. He doesn’t turn, doesn’t breathe. For a full ten seconds, it’s like time stops around us.
“You don’t have to say anything,” I add quickly. “I’m with Sienna now. She’s… She’s the real thing. I love her.”
He finally turns. “But you loved me first.”
I nod. “Yeah. You were my first everything. Even if nothing ever happened.”
His expression twists—something between regret and revelation. “I’ll be damned. So you’re bi, then?”
I sigh. “I guess, technically. I’ve never been attracted to another man in that way, but I can’t deny what I felt back then.”
What I still feel, but I don’t say it.
Because how much of it is real and how much is simply an ache from the past?
Sienna is real. Sienna is the present.
Jake clenches his jaw. “Fuck. That’s huge, man. I had no idea.”
“Yeah. Well, you know me. I don’t exactly wear my heart on my sleeve.”
He exhales sharply. “No. I mean, you sure didn’t back then.”
