WOLF
Ifeel my heart harden and grow heavy in my chest. My stomach turns over, and the blood runs faster through my veins. It started the minute Molly didn’t come in through the front door. It continued when I rushed out to the back deck to head her off. And it blew up into something resembling panic when she took off after our argument.
After heading back inside, I can’t stand still; like I’m trying to get away from the emotions. My jaw clenches and my throat feels raw as I pace before forcing myself against a plain expanse of wall. Leaning my forehead against it, I close my eyes, trying to focus; to get a grip. But the emotions swirling inside me are like a cyclone, and it’s too much. The photo frames shake as I slam my fist into the wall hard. And then again. I’m able to stop myself the third time and tear away from the wall. The intense feelings have taken over and I don’t know how to ride them out unlike most people.
The urgent pacing resumes and before I know it, I let autopilot takeover and scoop up my keys. I barely give a thought to jumping in my truck and heading toward our familyheadquarters. Even though Hawk is the one I feel I should talk to, he’s not going to talk to me about something like this. So I bypass his cabin and head straight for the main lodge. One thing I can depend on Uncle Bert and Dana for is being creatures of habit. They’re most likely in the small kitchen, having dinner about this time of day.
The smell of steak and au gratin potatoes proves me right as I swiftly enter. “Bert!” I call out, not breaking stride as I approach the kitchen. I emerge through the small doorway to see him already rising from the bench of the table.
“Wolf? What the hell’s going on?” he asks as Dana turns from the sink, her soft features etched in concern.
I stop barely a foot away from my uncle. “I’m going to lose my wife. She’s upset, and she walked away from me,” I spew out in rapid succession. It’s like the quicker I get the words out, the quicker we can find a solution for me.
“Okay, first of all, I don’t mean to sound like a dick, but if she pulls the plug on the marriage, she’d lose everything. You still have her.”
“I still have the marriage, but I don’t have her. I’m going to lose her.”
“Slow down,” he reaches to place a hand on my shoulder, and have a seat. Take a breath and start from the beginning.”
I prop an elbow on the table and straddle the bench, alternately rubbing my eyes and running a hand through my hair as I delve into the events that led me here. Bert listens as he gets up and retrieves the whiskey and two glasses from one of the cabinets. I’m just wrapping up when he sits back down and pours himself a couple fingers. I wave him away when he tries to do the same for me.
He faces me, glass in hand, his shoulders tense and his eyebrows pulled up in thought. “Sounds to me like you’re justseeing her mad for the first time, and you don’t know what to do with it.”
Dana takes a seat across from us, dropping a dishrag on the tabletop. “Yeah, darlin’,” she agrees. “This is just part of being in a relationship. It doesn’t mean it’s over. She just needs to cool down for a bit.”
“But,” Bert interjects pointedly, shooting me a knowing look that borders on cautionary “and you’re not going to like this next part, but you’re going to have totalk.”
“That’s right.” Dana’s voice is melodious, like she’s almost singing her agreement.
“Fuck,” I mutter, rubbing at the back of my neck.
“Hey.” Bert raises his voice slightly, putting a small amount of authority behind it. “You had no problem coming to us just now to talk about your problems.”
“You’re my family.”
“And so is she now,” Dana points out lightly. “How much time she’s put in is irrelevant at this point.”
“But still, it’s only been a couple of months?—”
“And what’s changed in that time?” Bert cuts me off with a challenge in his voice. “Because I’ve seen you all since, and don’t you dare tell me nothing’s changed.”
“Of course it has, but that still doesn’t mean she should know my life story by now,” I say.
“Maybe not,” Bert tilts his head, “but how much does she know?”
“She…” I start right in, intent on arguing and proving his logic wrong but then realize I don’t have any words to argue with. Because how much does Molly know about me? She knows my parents died when I was younger and that I don’t like talking. And she knows I’m possessive of her, even when it comes to my brothers. When you add that up, she knows barely anything about me. And yet, I know she’s petrified of thunderstorms andthat she bakes when she’s upset and that she fishes when she’sreallyupset and that her mom had her young and wasn’t good to her. That she’s lost the only family she’s ever known and so now… I’m it. I’m her family, along with the people that come as part of my package. And while I could go on all day about things I know about her, she barely knows a thing about me. Fuck.
I’m stuck in a heavy and painful moment of realizing how wrong I’ve been and can’t find any words to salvage my argument when Forest appears in the doorway with the phone to his ear. He glances into the room briefly, his eyes open wide and brows raised in interest, before he turns his mouth back to his phone. I can barely hear him, but I swear to God I hear “I gotta go” followed by “I love you” before he hangs up. I can’t be sure if I heard it right but that’s a serious what-the-fuck-moment for another time.
He pockets his phone in the back of his jeans before wandering in. Great.
“What’s going on here?” He asks, his eyes darting between each of the three of us and I huff out a breath of frustration, snatching up the whisky and pouring in just an inch as Bert fills him in.
“Wolf…” Forest addresses me as he slowly strides to Dana’s side of the table and takes a seat next to her. “I feel like I’ve always been understanding with you and people, and feelings and all that but…” He laces his fingers together and rests his hands on the table. “I kind of thought Molly would be an exception. Especially after you did something none of us thought you’d ever do and married her. Why haven’t you been letting her get to know you?”
Instead of being quick to jump and defend myself, this time I take a moment to think about it. “I guess, I didn’t realize I had been shutting her out that much. I’ve… We’ve been close—happyeven. I thought we were doing good. I didn’t realize there’s so much I needed to share with her.”
“Son, that whole incident is part of what makes you who you are.” He’s only half right. I was always reserved and distant; the incident just didn’t do me any favors. “And when you’re married, you’resupposedto share things like that.”
